“It Took Me 36 Years, But I Did It!”: “Baby Reindeer” Star Jessica Gunning Just Got Emotional As She Shared Her Seriously Heartwarming Coming Out Story

The 38-year-old star had been an established theater and TV actor for several years before this breakout role, and even starred alongside Cate Blanchett in the 2019 play When We Have Sufficiently Tortured Each Other — but it is undeniably her performance as Martha that truly made her mainstream.

And in recent weeks, Jessica has slowly been introducing her real self to her newfound fans in a series of interviews and podcast appearances, with the actor opening up about her sexuality and even sharing her sweet coming out story during a recent stint on the Reign with Josh Smith podcast.

Speaking to the host, Jessica revealed that she came out relatively late in life after years of struggling to understand herself.

“I still can't articulate it in the best way, but I realized I was a big old gay, and I was like: ‘That’s what its been, that’s what it is,'” Jessica continued: “And that was a massive moment where everything clicked, and I made sense for myself then.”

“For so long, I’d thought — and I’m a bigger woman — and I thought maybe it was to do with my size, that I felt a little bit almost alien, or I was tagging along,” she explained. “But as soon as I realized, I was like: ‘No, it’s that.’ And that was the most liberating thing.”

Jessica then fought back tears as she reflected on a moving scene in Baby Reindeer where Richard Gadd’s character, Donny, comes out to his parents. 

She said: “There's a really emotional thing, actually, in Baby Reindeer where Donny talks about sleeping for the first time at his parents' house, and I told my family at Christmas that year, and I slept for 10 hours that night."

“It had been a little secret, I guess, that I’d been keeping from myself even,” Jessica recalled. “And not in a hating way; I never felt I was repressing anything in a bad way or that any reaction would be bad. I just kind of was like… I didn’t think I could be, and then when it all clicked, I was like: ‘Oh, it makes so much sense.’”

“I mean, in hindsight, I used to go downstairs and watch The L Word, so that would have been a bit of a giveaway!” she then joked. “Everyone around me was probably like: ‘When is she going to come out?’ and it took me 36 years, but I did it!”

Still, Jessica is just glad to be out now, and said that she found the whole experience “amazing and very freeing and very grounding.” She then concluded: “I feel really peaceful, actually.”

And Broadway star Cynthia Erivo is among those who have celebrated Jessica and her story, with Cynthia commenting on Josh’s Instagram clip of the interview: “When she spoke about sleeping for 10 hours. 🥺 I’m so glad she got a little peace 🥹❤️”

“What a magical & comforting conversation to be a fly on the wall to. This was perfect,” presenter Yasmin Evans added. Somebody else wrote: “Sobbing at this 😭 i remember the 12 hour sleep after coming out 💜”

And another user added: “What a beautiful moment!”