How to know if you were raised by a narcissistic parent: ‘You’ll hear things like, my mum is my best friend... I’m like her mini therapist – that’s a big red flag’

We’ve been warned to recognise the toxic traits of narcissism in our partners but what about when your parent is the culprit? Psychotherapists Katie McKenna and Helen Villiers want to raise awareness of the long-term damage caused by narcissistic mothers and fathers

Parental narcissism

Katie Byrne

Narcissists and the people they hurt have loomed large in popular culture for the past decade. Across social media, we’re taught how to identify them, deal with them and, ultimately, disentangle from them. But what happens when the narcissist isn’t a manipulative lover, toxic friend or conniving boss? What if it’s the person who knows you best?

Parental narcissism is a topic not often discussed but, for psychotherapists Helen Villiers and Katie McKenna, it’s a very common theme in their therapy sessions. The pair host the popular podcast In Sight — Exposing Narcissism. Now, they’ve written a book on the legacy and damage caused by narcissistic and emotionally abusive parents.