A woman has been praised for "punishing" her brother by refusing to attend his wedding after he said it would be child-free.
Weddings are meant to be a time of celebration where family members get together, but sometimes they can test even the closest of relationships.
In a viral Reddit post from June 26, user pr1ncessazula wrote that her 20-year-old brother is getting married to his fiancée, 19. She added that, while she is happy for the couple, there was a sticking point regarding the wedding that would stop her from attending.
The woman, 25, added: "They let us know that the wedding would be childfree as well, which is entirely their choice, however as much as it hurts I don't think I am going to be attending.
"My daughter, 2, has recently been diagnosed with epilepsy, which I have also dealt with most of my life so I know this gets worse before it gets better. We are going through tests, medication changes," she wrote.
"The venue is over three hours away and I am completely uncomfortable leaving her for that long."
The poster added: "I let my brother know this and he was hurt and said that I am punishing them for having a child-free wedding, and they are entitled to do so.
"I said he is absolutely entitled to do so, but they gave little notice and he can't get mad when people put their children first, especially when they are dealing with medical issues.
"He said I should just get a sitter and I told him absolutely not," the woman wrote. "I am not comfortable doing that with everything going on. He said I was being an a****** and 'sorry the world doesn't revolve around your kid.'"
Rima Barakeh, deputy editor at Hitched.co.uk, told Newsweek that there can be drawbacks to having a child-free wedding.
Barakeh said: "Deciding to have a child-free wedding is any couple's right, and we always encourage nearlyweds to make decisions based on the wedding they want, not the wedding that'll please their guests.
"However, when you make the decision to not invite children to your wedding, you have to understand that this comes with a risk, the risk being that some parents won't want to, or in some cases, won't be able to leave their children and attend the wedding," Barakeh added.
"One misconception amongst many couples is that having child-free weddings, or strict rules on plus-ones, has to be a one-size-fits-all, and it really doesn't," she said. "It's completely acceptable for couples to make exceptions for certain situations and guests, especially for a case like this one where a child has been recently diagnosed with a medical condition."
Barakeh added: "Having said that, if a couple's decision to not have any children at all at their wedding is completely non-negotiable, they have to understand that the respect for that rule must go both ways. Guests should respect the fact that the nearlyweds don't want any children whatsoever at their wedding, and in the same breath, the couple needs to respect the fact that the rule just won't work for some parents.
"It's also worth adding that, for parents, giving two weeks' notice of a strictly-no-children-allowed wedding that is three hours away is just not long enough for most parents to make childcare arrangements, especially when a medical condition is involved," Barakeh said.
Forty-one percent of respondents approved of wedding requests not to bring children, compared with 37 percent who disapproved, according to a July 2021 YouGov survey. Researchers questioned 1,295 U.S. adults between June 21 and 22 in 2021, and YouGov said the responding sample was "weighted to be representative of the US population."
The Reddit post has attracted around 6,800 upvotes and received more than 2,000 comments. The overwhelming majority of people who commented on the post backed the man's decision and criticized his brother for having a child-free wedding.
Reddit user theHermanator119 wrote: "Tell your brother the world doesn't revolve around his shotgun wedding."
Tonytown added: "Yeah, I'm sure the world will absolutely revolve around their child when it arrives 5 ½ months from now."
Goongagalunga commented: "When did this insane trend of childfree people having childfree weddings and telling parents what to 'do with their kids' begin? It's so pervasive."
Juicewheezers posted: "I don't know when child-free weddings started but I dislike them. I wanted anyone's kid who wanted to come to come."
Newsweek has contacted pr1ncessazula for comment via Reddit.
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