Choosing a baby name can be a challenge, especially when your pregnant sibling has claimed all the best ones.
That's exactly what happened to one Mumsnet user, who accuses her sister of "baby name entitlement" in a post on the U.K.-based parenting forum. She said they're both pregnant and her sister is having a boy while the poster is waiting to find out her baby's sex.
"Initially she told me a boys names she'd like to use so obviously I took that off my list," said the poster, who goes by the moniker Pregnantforwaytoolong.
"However she now keeps adding to her list and we're up to about 6 or 7 boys names [that she's] considering and I'm guessing doesn't want me to use. She hasn't directly said [but] it's heavily implied. Such as randomly testing 'oh btw we also like Jack' for example, I'll say 'oh yea we also like that one' and she'll reply 'well we're not sure if we're going to use it yet'.
The poster has expressed a wish to name her child after their mom if it's a girl. "Sister also isn't keen as 'is that fair, then yours will be the favorite,'" she wrote.
The poster doesn't know how many more names will be added to the list. "There are a couple I really like and liked before she 'claimed' them," she said.
The most popular baby names in 2023 are Olivia, Emma and Amelia for girls and Liam, Noah and Oliver for boys, according to Names.org, which uses information from the U.S Census Bureau and the Social Security Administration.
Stephanie O'Dea, a lifestyle author and life coach, spoke about the tricky family situation.
"You can't have dibs on an entire list of baby names. That's unfair and rather selfish," O'Dea told Newsweek. "My thought is that there is underlying tension here that is bubbling up and the second sister is feeling a bit behind because her baby is due after, so she is experiencing sibling rivalry.
O'Dea said many people think that sibling rivalry is outgrown once you become an adult.
"But unless those feelings are dealt with, they can fester and then trickle into the next generation, and the grandchildren are left to feel the tension and be forced to take sides. The best way to deal with it is head-on. The sisters need to decide that they are now the adults in the room, and it is more important for their future children to have a peaceful and calm home than it is to be right," O'Dea said.
She continued: "I'd suggest having a sit-down in a neutral space, with the end goal of picking one or two names for each gender and that is it. This may take a while if there are a lot of hurt feelings from the past that haven't been addressed, but if the shared common goal is to raise cousins that love each other unconditionally and get along, the hard work will be worth it."
On Mumsnet, 98 percent of 589 readers voted that the poster was "not being unreasonable."
"Name your baby what you want. Your sister sounds about 12 years old," said one user.
Another wrote: "You at least have the advantage of having your baby first. She sounds like she continuing any sibling rivalry."
Another commenter advised: "I would ignore....smile and wave! Don't talk to your sister about names."
Newsweek could not verify the details of the case.
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