Teen sent to girls' home for theft underwent 'inconsistent parenting', father made excuses for her

SINGAPORE: A 14-year-old girl who was sent to a girls' home for crimes including theft and cheating was subject to "inconsistent and inappropriate parenting" and was assaulted by her father.

While her mother was receptive to child protective service professionals' advice and tried to impose routine and discipline, her father vacillated between harsh and permissive parenting styles.

The girl, who was named only as Ella in a judgment published on Thursday (Apr 6), was sent to the Singapore Girls' Home for 21 months by a Youth Court.

Ella pleaded guilty to four charges. These are for stealing cosmetics from Watsons and cheating others of money by listing items on Carousell that she never delivered.

She was also involved in a group attack of a person who was hit with a knuckleduster. Another five charges were taken into consideration.

THE PARENTS SEEK HELP

After some of the crimes were committed, Ella's parents contacted the Singapore Children's Society on Feb 24, 2022 hoping to access the pre-Family Guidance Order regime because of Ella's challenging behaviour.

The society conducted a screening and found several risky behaviour that Ella engaged in. These included: Association with negative peers, underage smoking, vaping, alcohol consumption, sexualised behaviour, coming home late at night and staying away from home.

The screening also noted that the parents had inconsistent parenting styles.

Ella and her family were referred to a separate social service agency for therapy and case management, but Ella defaulted on three sessions without valid reasons.

When counsellors tried to work with Ella on her academic plans and association with negative peers, Ella expressed little concern and prioritised having fun, noted District Judge Amy Tung.

She continued to have late nights, stayed away from home for up to a week at times, and lied about where she was.

Her parents were taught communication and co-parenting skills, but any progress was hindered by the ongoing contentions and acrimony between them.

Because of escalating safety concerns, Ella's parents were advised to file an application for a Family Guidance Order at the Youth Court.

This is a court order that parents and guardians of children or young people who are below 16 can apply for if they need help guiding their child. 

FATHER CHANGES MIND

Ella's parents initially agreed to apply for this court order, but Ella's father decided not to proceed as Ella promised him that she would attend school.

Ella did not abide with the conditions of returning to her school and keeping her curfew. She was also found to have posted on social media about looking for a "sugar daddy", revealing love bites on herself.

The pre-Family Guidance Order intervention ended after Ella was remanded and criminal proceedings for her offences were pending.

Judge Tung said Ella was referred to the Child Protective Service six times in 2022 for alleged dating violence by her ex-boyfriend and behaviour that put her at risk.

Ella was also referred to the service for harsh physical punishment by her father. He was captured on home closed-circuit television pulling Ella's hair, kicking her stomach, slapping her face and cursing at her.

After this, Ella's mother applied for a personal protection order and domestic exclusion order for Ella, but the proceedings for these are ongoing.

The Child Protective Service noted that Ella's parents had difficulties exercising proper supervision and control over her, with their ability inhibited by their acrimonious relationship and conflicting parenting styles, which often "triangulated Ella", said Judge Tung.

When Ella was charged in August 2022, her mother posted bail for her. However, she discharged herself as a bailor less than a month later after finding 50 canisters of butane gas in Ella's room.

She believed that it was safer for Ella to be placed in the structured environment of Singapore Girls' Home.

However, Ella's father posted bail for her. After being bailed out, Ella continued to spend time with her negative peers and her mother found more canisters of butane gas in her room. 

Her bail was revoked in October 2022 and Ella was remanded at Singapore Girls' Home. She was later given another chance to be bailed out, with stricter curfew hours and a higher bail amount, but she breached her bail conditions again and ran away from home.

Ella's parents are undergoing divorce proceedings. Her mother made full restitution to the victims of Ella's scams, with Ella agreeing to pay her mother back through deductions in her monthly allowances.

Ella's father asked for probation instead, offering to supervise her and saying he would personally take Ella to and from school.

He asked for a chance for Ella to go through her growing up years at home and said Ella is "a tragic victim of circumstances and has fallen prey to bad influences".

JUDGE NOT CONVINCED

Judge Tung said there was limited progress in attempting to turn Ella around using community-based programmes, and she did not show herself receptive.

"In my view, a community-based rehabilitative option such as probation requires strong familial support and a resolve on the part of the offender to turn life around for himself or herself," said Judge Tung.

She said she was not convinced in this case that Ella's parents are able to provide the necessary familial support or supervision at this stage. 

"They are currently in a conflictual relationship and undergoing acrimonious divorce proceedings. They are thus facing stressors themselves and are not in a good position to support Ella," she said.

She added that a counsellor had reported that the parents' differences in rule setting and inconsistencies in updating each other on Ella's whereabouts allowed Ella to take advantage of the communication gaps to bend the rules.

Judge Tung said it was also clear that the father continues to exhibit a blaming attitude towards the mother, blaming her for Ella being anti-social and rebellious.

"While the father had offered to be the supervising parent, I was of the view that he is not suited to be as such," said the judge. "The father presented as a doting father who downplayed the seriousness of Ella's actions and often made excuses for her."

For example, Ella said her father caught her sniffing butane and scolded her, but her father maintained to the investigating probation officer that Ella had never inhaled butane gas.

Instead, he claimed that Ella had told him that the canisters were consumed by her friends and that she was keeping them only to show off.

He has filed an appeal against the court order sending Ella to Singapore Girls' Home.