We’re four episodes into Ted Lasso’s third and final season, and you may have noticed that our titular mustachioed leading man has been mostly playing on the sidelines. This has given us plenty of time to venture into the lives of the very funny ensemble that surrounds good ol’ Ted. But it was only a matter of time until he came into clearer focus. And what better occasion for that to happen than the big West Ham vs. Richmond game we’ve all been breathlessly anticipating?

And in case you were wondering how he’s been doing, Sassy (Ellie Taylor) sums it up quite simply: “You are a mess.” In fact, she goes one further: “You are such a mess,” she adds as Ted tries to protest her characterization. She’s not wrong—and she delivers the description with such nonchalance (and so little judgment) that it makes sense it would unsettle Ted. Guess it takes one to know one. Because if there’s one thing we know about Sassy is that she’s also a mess, one who at least recognizes the work she’s still doing on herself. Ted, on the other hand, is clearly spiraling and hadn’t quite realized that’s what he was (is?) doing; no surprise given how much he still craves having the guidance of Dr. Sharon. It seems he’s still a bit emotionally adrift.

It also explains why he’s been a tad removed from Richmond and the team’s coming match against West Ham. This has left Coach Beard and Roy (Brendan Hunt and Brett Goldstein) with the bulk of the training decisions. Oh, except this one: Ted does put his foot down and refuses to use security footage showing Nathan (Nick Mohammed) sabotaging the iconic “BELIEVE” poster in the team’s locker room. In true Lasso spirit, Ted is of the mind that anger is no way to motivate anyone (let alone a team high on their recent Zava-fueled wins). That is, while he knows the team would rightfully be irate at seeing Nate’s petty antics, Ted will never be the kind of man/person/coach to use that kind of ammo.

As it turns out, he is correct. Because oh boy do Coach Beard and Roy royally screw it up when they use their mid-game locker room pep talk time to throw Nate under the bus. Richmond plays with such anger and rancor it’s actually surprising they make it through the match in one piece. Again, not one to “told you so,” Ted mostly focuses his energy on looking ahead: You’re only ever as good as your next game, no? But you have to imagine losing and losing like they did—and to Nate, no less!—is going to take a hit on the team.

Speaking of Nate, his story remains the most heartbreaking in the larger Ted Lasso universe. Just as I mentioned in my season three opener recap, this season is clearly wanting us to see Ted and Nate as two competing approaches to life and coaching. Watching Nate tear up the “BELIEVE” sign made that all clear as day, as did those moments when the once wide-eyed “wonderkid” failed to see anything but his win in front of him. At heart, Nate remains a bullied and/or ignored child who wears his insecurities nakedly, and no amount of trying to embiggen himself in his or anyone’s eyes will soothe his fears of never feeling like enough. It’s why that moment where he realizes he left Ted standing as the Richmond coach had hoped to shake his hand and congratulate him struck him so. He’s got his blinders on, and it’s unclear what will get him to realize (like Ted has) that winning may not be the only thing that brings folks like them satisfaction.

Ted recognizes this. He knows hurt people hurt people (cue that “pain is like carbon monoxide” quote!) and all he sees when he watches Nate tear posters or giddily celebrate yet another West Ham goal is someone who hopes he’ll stop hurting once he gets enough validation. (Although, if that celebratory sip of a drink is any indication, Nate doesn’t really have the stamina to be the anti-Lasso he wishes to become.)

Speaking of needlessly focusing on a win as a way to deal with interpersonal relationships, we need to talk about Rebecca (played by the incomparable Hannah Waddingham). Hearing her say, through gritted grinning teeth that she believes in Ted was both hilarious and heartbreaking. Because you see just how much Rupert still has a hold on her own sense of self and self-worth. So much of what these characters (Keeley and Roy included) are learning is that they should really stop triangulating their emotions via their jobs, their wins, their team. The breakthrough moment for Ted this episode was seeing him not swallowing his pride or his anger (at the team, at his ex-wife) but actually getting in touch with his feelings and airing them without a hint of the smiley, happy-go-lucky attitude we’ve come to expect. There may be hope still for this work in “progmess” yet!

• In case you missed it, this episode was dedicated to Grant Wahl, the American sports journalist who died while covering the 2022 FIFA World Cup last year.
• We are now two for two when it comes to bare butts in opening scenes; will next week make it three for three?
• Ted having a photo of Bryant’s Barbecue on his desktop feels very on brand, no? Him knowing the plots of 2011 films like No Strings Attached and Friends With Benefits? Jury’s out. Mostly because, in what we see of Ted he’s so rarely actually consuming pop culture—it’s those jokes that feel more driven by what the (very funny) writers’ room can come up with than what a middle-aged football-turned-soccer coach would actually dabble in.
• You gotta love Keeley and the way Juno Temple has slowly turned this footballer bimbo girlfriend into a well-rounded character who’s striving to become the version of herself she’d never allowed herself to envision. Much of that has been due to her friendship with Rebecca, so seeing her needing to navigate relationships (work and otherwise) with the likes of Shandy, Barbara, and now Jack is putting into clearer focus not just where she’s been but where she’s headed. (Also, can we talk about that Keeley/Jack meeting? Best period humor we’ve seen in the show yet.)
• “It’s short for my dad wanted a boy” is the line that made me hope we get plenty more of Jack this season.
• Oh, Shandy (Ambreen Razia)... e worried you might be a decision Keeley would come to regret and, well, we were all right. (That said, I am very here for more Barbara/Keeley content. They make for such a wild odd couple that I’m eager to see what they can each learn from one another should they choose to really bond.)
• The less we talk about the physical reaction I had to hearing Brett Goldstein saying “Get dressed or I’ll start flicking your balls,” the better for all of us.
• Zava and his platitudes (“Dream big and you may never wake up”) may start to wear thin. Can a team really rally only around one person? Might Jamie be the one teammate who realizes this before everyone else does?