Mom Cheered for Forcing Teen to Use Birthday Money to Replace Damaged Items
Internet users have praised a parent for demanding that their 15-year-old daughter pays with her birthday money for using up expensive hair products.
The frustrated mom posted as user Blockfr on the UK-based advice website Mumsnet on March 20. She explained that she'd bought some "expensive shampoo and conditioner" for almost $50 [£40], to help repair extensive damage to her hair after dyeing it.
A 2017 survey by the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) asked 48,000 15-year-olds about their knowledge of personal finance. The results showed that 1 in 4 students, across the 15 countries surveyed, couldn't make simple decisions on spending. The survey also found that 56 percent of students have their own bank account, but two-thirds didn't have the skills to manage it.
Despite the daughter using the luxury products only once, the original poster was furious to see the bottles had been opened and left spilling out into the drain. Feeling as though the money was literally going down the drain, the mom wrote how the apparent disrespect from the daughter made her feel "really annoyed."
"It's not just the fact she has used it without asking, but to not have enough respect to even look after it," the post reads.
"Half the bottle's gone now. She recently had her birthday and has money. Am I unreasonable to say she needs to replace them with her money?"
The mom wrote that she is "always buying things" to help maintain the daughter's long, curly hair. So, finding her own expensive products going to waste was a step too far.
The daughter has previously ruined her phone and laptop and trashed her own bedroom, but seems to have no care for the damages caused.
In a subsequent comment on the post, the mom wrote that the daughter is "constantly doing things" like this. "I understand she's learning, but she just leaves a trail of destruction. It's like she doesn't care because she knows I will pick it up," she added.
While this parent appears to be grappling with the decision to make the teenager pay for the damages, psychologist and parenting expert Amanda Gummer told Newsweek that this was a teaching lesson.
Gummer, who founded The Good Play Guide, says children need to learn consequences for their actions. Paying for their own things teaches them the importance of money.
"It's important that children have an understanding of their actions, especially at the age of 15," Gummer said.
"It's a good idea for children to start having their own money in the form of an allowance, so they learn how much things like cosmetics, toiletries, leisure activities cost. They can learn to budget once they are in school.
"It's important they understand that waste is unacceptable when it's avoidable, both from a financial point of view, and of course from an environmental one, too," Gummer added.
She also said that encouraging children to earn money by doing chores is another incentive for them to help around the house to get what they want.
The Mumsnet user's post has already received over 170 replies. Many fellow parents supported the decision to make the daughter pay for the haircare products she wasted.
One person commented: "She will only learn if her actions inconvenience her, so yes I would make her pay for a replacement, or stop pocket money until the debt was paid."
However, there were some users who felt it was harsh to make her use birthday money to cover the damage. One wrote about an alternative method: "I think it's mean to make her use her birthday money in any case. If you want to make a point, can you get her to earn the cash back instead?"
Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.
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