LOS ANGELES — It’s the month known for love, but if you’re still looking for it, you’re not alone. Nearly half of “single-and-looking” adults have turned to online dating in the past year, according to the Pew Research Center.

Now, in the age of social media, many are trying to navigate a new dating scene online.

For Izu Aginwa, dreaming big is in his blood. He said failure was never an option for his strict Nigerian parents.

“Put whatever questions you want to ask in the chat,” Aginwa said to his Instagram followers as he prepares to record his podcast. 

Now the 28-year-old hosts a podcast, owns a digital media marketing company called Riches and Saint and has several other business ventures he’s working on. 

It’s a dream come true by many measures of entrepreneurship, but on this day, he and his co-hosts discussed the reality that building an empire just doesn’t leave much room for dating. 

“I’m single because I’m very, very, very, very, busy, No. 1 and No. 2 it’s a matter of intentionality. I want somebody to match my level of intention,” Aginwa explained. 

Even with online dating sites such as Match, Aginwa said making lasting romantic connections in the age of social media isn’t easy. 

The millennial and Gen Z generations spend a good portion of their free time online, but he doesn’t feel like dating apps capture his true essence. 

“One of the most special things about me is the energy and presence I bring to a room. So, I can’t do that on an app,” he said. 

It’s why therapist and dating strategist Kimmy Seltzer said she tells anyone looking for love to treat dating apps like a practice platform, getting to know people as friends before anything serious. 

She said she’s seen a significant increase in loneliness among clients in their 20s, but also for those like her client Detris Brown who are navigating the dating scene in their 40s.

“With the younger crowd, I’m seeing that has been the way that they’ve learned how to connect — through the computer. But then there’s a lack of social skills, there’s a lack of connecting emotionally,” Seltzer explained.

She teaches her clients to slow down to build a meaningful connection, but also helps them look and feel their best so they attract what they want. Detris said it’s been a challenge to put herself out there and become more aware of how she’s presenting herself to the world. 

“It is daunting, it is intimidating to look at myself and look at people in ways I’ve never looked at before, but it’s a welcomed challenge,” Brown said.  

Seltzer is giving her the tools to help her feel confident enough to accept that challenge with simple tips like how to flirt.

It’s a challenge Aginwa tells his listeners he’s ready to accept, too.

“I feel like I’m just getting to the space of where I can attract the level of where I feel is deserving of where I want to go,” he said. 

Seltzer said she is also seeing a trend called “guard-railing” where people are a lot more cautious and in-tune with their emotional needs and how they connect with others as we come out of the pandemic.

She has a podcast called “Charisma Quotient” that teaches how to build confidence from the outside, in. To listen, click here.