Shakira's split with Gerard Pique puts spotlight on infidelity in relationships

Over the weekend, musical sensation and ‘Waka Waka’ hitmaker Shakira announced her separation with FC Barcelona defender Gerard Pique after being in a relationship with him for over a decade. The news came as a shock to fans of Shakira and Pique, who were under the impression that the couple was happy together.

While there has been no official confirmation from the two on the same, reputed entertainment portals have confirmed that the separation was a result of Pique cheating on Shakira which left the fans in disbelief. ‘If Shakira and Beyonce can get cheated on, there’s no hope for us, ladies’ - the above quote sums up the sentiment on social media that many women and men had.

The question is a pertinent one. If Shakira, a three-time Grammy winner, one of the bestselling music artists of all time and a gorgeous woman in own right, can get cheated on, is there any hope for lesser mortals like us? The split sparked an intense debate around infidelity in relationships on social media. There were polarised opinions.

While some felt that infidelity doesn’t have much to do with the physical appearance and the status of the person who’s being cheated on, others felt that looks and money do play an important role. Here’s what the relationship experts have to say.

Why do people cheat in relationships?

A study on sex and marital therapy surveyed 495 people out of which 87.9% were heterosexuals and were asked the reason why they were unfaithful to their partner in a relationship. The key reasons included anger, self-esteem issues and feelings of neglect. From the above reasons, it seems that it is the inherent, deep-rooted psychological complexes of an individual that makes them cheat on their partner.

However, the rest of the reasons also included a need for variety, sexual desire and low commitment. To play the devil’s advocate, people could, in fact, cheat when they get bored in a relationship and seek variety and adventure. While there is no straight answer to the question ‘why do people cheat’, it could, in fact, be both the lack of connection and the deep rooted insecurities (of the partner who cheats), that could play a role.

What should I do if I am cheated on?

Clinical psychologists suggest that the first and foremost thing to do when you are cheated on is to not blame yourself and manage your mental health better. Seek therapy if needed.

Psychologists also say that it is okay to grieve and accept the feelings of regret. Having said that, it is also important to not seek revenge and move on sans temptations of rekindling the affair. Some psychologists say that it is also important not to lie to yourself and be honest about what transpired.

All in all, there could be a plethora of reasons why a person chooses to be unfaithful in a relationship. While there is no straight answer, it is advisable to move on and seek better relationships.

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