When it comes to sex and solo play, “the wetter, the better,” said Melanie Davis, a sexuality counselor and partner in the New Jersey Center for Sexual Wellness.
Davis told HuffPost that the simple act of incorporating lubrication pre-, post- or mid-coitus can make sex better by heightening sensation, easing discomfort and even helping to prevent the transmission of infections and viruses.
“Lube helps ease uncomfortable friction and helps decrease micro-tears in the tissues. That’s important as part of safer sex and transmission of infections and viruses,” Davis said.
Yael R. Gonzalez, a sex coach and creator of Sex Positive You, a platform that provides resources for navigating sexual interactions, said that it’s one of the most underrated ways to improve sex.
“Lube’s main purpose is to increase comfort and pleasure in sexual activities. Some people assume it’s mainly meant for anal sex when, really, it can be used during masturbation regardless of genitals, as well as vaginal sex, oral sex and, of course, anal sex,” Gonzales told HuffPost. “And for penises, especially if the penis is circumcised, lubrication will help reduce soreness and pain.”
There’s a long-standing social consensus that incorrectly associates arousal with natural wetness that’s to blame for any stigma surrounding artificial lubricant, said Davis. “Someone can be super aroused yet on the dry side due to the menstrual cycle, overall hydration, their birth control method, stress, menopause, alcohol and medications,” she said. “Partners can help by reaching for the lube first, [thereby] normalizing its use.”
How can you “slip” onto the pleasure-train yourself? It can feel intimidating to shop for lube when a barrage of aggressive names like “Xtreme”and “Lubilicious” are jumping off shelves and product pages without any indication of how pleasure-seeking folks can best use them.
Fortunately, Gonzales broke down the primary types of personal lubricants on the market. “There are four major categories of lube: water-based, silicone-based, oils and hybrids,” she explained.
Water-based: Often touted for its versatility, this is a crowd-pleasing option that won’t stain clothing or bedding and can be used with virtually any toy or contraceptive. The only downside is that doesn’t last as long as other formulations and can’t be used for water play.
Silicone: Popular for how luxuriously smooth it feels and its lasting-power, even in water, silicone is also hypoallergenic and good for those with sensitive skin. Just don’t use it on silicone-based toys (it can cause them to degrade over time) and be careful of staining your sheets.
Oil: Ideal for longer sessions and massages, oils can also be great for skin. Avoid using oil with any latex-based contraceptives such as condoms, because oil can break down the material.
Hybrids: These usually contain a combination of both water-based and silicone-based lubricants and offer the best of what both formulations have to offer. That being said, you should still be cautious using this with silicone toys.
Davis added that you should be equally diligent about avoiding certain kinds of ingredients in your lube.
“A general rule is to keep the ingredient list simple, avoiding fragrances, warming and cooling agents. If you are susceptible to yeast infections or UTIs, avoid sugars like glycerin and sorbitol. Some people with hormone-receptive cancers should also avoid parabens, but always check with your healthcare provider if you have any concerns,” Davis said.
In the list below, we did most of legwork for you and compiled a collection of various lubricants from the above categories, each one formulated with body-safe ingredients. Get slippery with a hybrid-lubricant that has a luxurious satin-like texture, a water-base lube designed specifically to work with the body’s natural chemistry and nourishing cold-pressed massage oil infused with skin-loving ingredients.
HuffPost may receive a share from purchases made via links on this page. Every item is independently selected by the HuffPost Shopping team. Prices and availability are subject to change.
She also suggested opting for smaller quantities of different lubricants before committing to a full-size bottle. This sampler pack from Sliquid contains all of the brand's best-selling natural lubes in single-use sachets that are great for travel. Inside the box, you'll find a mixture of water-based lubricants, lubes with thicker gel-like consistencies, silicone-based options with silkier textures and flavored choices like blackberry fig and tangerine peach.
