'Big Mouth': 16 Hilarious Lola Ugfuglio Skumpy Quotes That Make Her the Queen of Season 5
Big Mouth Season 5 is now available on Netflix and the abrasive and ill-tempered Lola has emerged as a fan favorite.
To use her full name, Lola Ugfuglio Skumpy is the tragic, cruel, aggressive character that audiences somehow still love and root for.
Possibly thanks to Nick Kroll's emphatic delivery of every line, Lola's journey from middle school student to foot fetishist and registered sex offender is a Season 5 highlight.
Follow her rise and fall with these 16 classic quotes uttered by Lola in Season 5 of Big Mouth on Netflix.
Warning: Many of these quotes are incredibly NSFW.
1. British or Gay?
"With my gay pubes as my witness, I will get my vengeance." Her pubes, who are manifested as knights in shining armor, reply: "We're not gay your majesty, we're just British." Deadpan as ever, Lola replies, "What's the difference!?"
2. Toe Cleavage
Devious as ever, Lola is determined to break Jay's vow to participate in No Nut November. She devises a plan to taunt him with her feet on a livestream.
"Hey guys just squishing my dirty little nuggies in some fresh mud. A little bit is coming through my toe cleavage. It's a really tight space, but not so tight a tongue couldn't fit in it. Anyway, good luck with No Nut November." She then whispers to the camera: "I'm looking at you Jay."
3. Pillow-la
Knowing exactly what her ex Jay wants, she reveals how she gets her information. Dressed as Pillow-la she informs him: "Your family's Alexa reports back to me sh**head." Then repeating Rick the Hormone Monster, she chants, "Meow meow meow meow meow, I'm a cat who likes to f***."
4. Netflix Description
When the Shame Wizard returns, each of the students finds something to be self conscious about. In Lola's case, "Oh no. Is this the episode where I discover I don't have the perfect pussy?" The Shame Wizard then shows her that's what it says in the Netflix description—it doesn't by the way. We checked.
5. Egg.
Pretty self-explanatory this one. "How can I relax with a f***ing egg in my p****?"
Enough said.
6. Lola's Revenge
Getting revenge on Devin for making fun of her camel toe, Lola uses the egg she had removed to make her an egg mayo sandwich. Wanting a bite herself, Lola grabs it and says, "Oh Lola, you're crazy for this one. Chomp." In classic cartoon style, the screen circles in on the frame but catches Lola on it's way. "F***, the circle caught on my neck. Someone call Rodney [her mom's parole officer]."
7. Volunteering
Substitute teacher Mr. Keating asks his class if anyone would like to volunteer to present to the class. Inadvertently, Lola slams the concept before taking center stage. "Volunteering is a joke. It's like uhhh, get paid. But at the same time, I crave the spotlight. Action Lola."
Bonus line: after she performs, Lola translates the true meaning behind Shakespeare's play, "So that's Hamlet, which of course, is French for tiny Ham so..."
8. Unhealthy Level of Narcissism
After Mr. Keating (Adam Scott) is driven to insanity by Andrew's obsession, he's dismissed from the school. Sad to see him leave, Lola complains before bringing herself out of the funk pretty quickly.
"He's the only teacher to believe in me and not hit on me. And what's the deal with that Mr. Keating? I'm a catch and if you don't see that maybe you should get f***ing fired you substitute nobody."
9. Relatable Hilarity
We've all done this right? Muttered an off-the-cuff joke to ourselves and then considered a career in professional comedy? Lola is eating the last of her Halloween candy and says, "The wrapper says funsize but it doesn't feel fun. Oh my god should I do stand up? Go Lola."
10. Lack of Impulse Control
Eating food that's too hot out of the microwave is also relatable right? But eating it while it's still in the microwave is a bit of a stretch. Lola's lack of impulse turns Jay on though.
"I've been burned before. Mainly from eating Totinos Pizza rolls in the microwave while they're still like very much in the microwave."
11. Rob Gronkowski's Bobble Butt
Informing the raccoon repo men moving her items into Jay's new place, she reveals her love for NFL player Rob Gronkowski. She informs the animal: "Put that Gronk bobble butt on my night stand. He's got that Gronkadonk that makes my Lola lump plump."
12. David Copper-f***
Some of the best put-downs are the simplest. After revealing to the world how Jay did his magic trick, she tells him: "You call me a name so I ruin your life. Your move David Copper-f***."
13. Breaking the Fourth Wall
During her Christmas "Snowmom" segment, which plays out in claymation, Lola gets a visit from "Rodney, her mom's parole officer." When he tells her she doesn't have to keep saying that as his full title, Lola helps the audience out by telling him: "You're honestly a very tertiary character, Rodney."
14. L-O-L
After sharing a video of Jay, Lola lands herself on the sex offenders register. However, she once again breaks the fourth wall to acknowledge her own growing popularity.
"My name is Lola Skumpy and I am legally obligated to tell you I am a sex offender for doing revenge porn, but like in a totally hilarious way that has most of the people at home rooting for me and like L-O-L-ing for real. L-O-L-Lola."
15. War on Drugs
After seeing Jay completely devastated, she begins to regret her actions, but uses an analogy that may not be completely accurate.
"Alas, like the war on drugs I might have won, but like, at what cost?"
16. Hurting the Ones She Loves
Once again proving how much of a wonderfully warped mind Lola possesses, when talking to her British pubes, she reveals the fate of one of her pets.
"Just as I asked my hamster, Eli after his untimely death, 'Why do we microwave the ones we love the most?'"
Seasons 1-5 of Big Mouth are available to watch on Netflix now.
