It all goes a bit sexy musical chairs from time to time, especially when a Bombshell, for that is their official role, enters the villa. Yet according to reports, the reality series has gone off the boil with even die-hard viewers. The show attracted an average of 2.47 million viewers on launch night; its smallest audience since 2017 (2019’s premiere was watched in the UK by 3.3 million viewers). In Ireland, the Love Island season seven launch drew a TV audience in Ireland of 218,800. By July 7, the figures had taken a dip to 162,600. However, Virgin Media have a much sunnier outlook on viewing figures, noting in figures released yesterday that they’ve enjoyed bumper ratings — 1.8 million viewers to date, with an average of 460,000 views per episode — based on figures compiled from all viewing platforms, including repeats and +1. Still, it’s impossible to shake the feeling that, four weeks into the Love Island experience, we’ve crossed the Rubicon from sizzle to fizzle.

So, where are the iconic moments? The memes? Where did it all go less-than-right for the parade of brawny hunks and lithe huns?

1 The schedules are a bit busy, in fairness

Listen, it’s a bumper summer for sports fans between Wimbledon, the Euros and the Olympics, and Love Island has been a casualty of this particular embarrassment of riches. According to one report, Love Island dropped 1 million TV viewers at the end of June as both the tennis and footie drew the crowds.  

2 We’re (whisper it) a bit bored

I’m going to call it. Love Island has long looked like an extended advert for Boohoo.com (or protein shakes), but without a high drama chaser, the series is starting to become a triumph of style over substance. The stakes are never truly raised sufficiently to keep us on the edge of the seat: this week, the biggest ‘water cooler’ moment involved Hugo giving Toby a telling off for being a bit of a player.  

3 Everyone’s so beautiful

Wondering why it’s hard to get truly invested in these couples? Because the contestants are often swapping out one beefcake/pouty blonde for another. The beauty quotient on this show is so heightened that the contestants have started to become slightly interchangeable to the untrained eye. You’d like to think that things might get even more interesting if they lobbed a plus-sized beauty, or a dad-bodded dude, into the mix. But that’s not ever likely to happen. The contestants are only truly interested in (ugh) punching above their weight. 

4 A lack of Laura?

Laura Whitmore did a sterling job as the mistress of ceremonies in the Majorcan villa… well, for the 12 minutes of screen time that she’s enjoyed to date. Granted, we are living in Unprecedented Times with quarantines and amber lists and the like, but the presenter of the show made a single appearance on opening night, with texts on a Samsung galaxy picking up much of the spadework after that.

5 Friendship never ends

Yes, there is snogging and under-the-duvet stuff happening, but the real romance on Love Island is between the girls, who have each other’s backs and plaintively whisper ‘I Love You’ to each other at every crunch moment. It’s refreshing that the girls have shown rivalry and catfighting the door, but these cuddly, consistent bonds don’t exactly make for sparkling TV. Similarly, the bromance factor often means that the male contestants tend to hesitate before they break ‘boy code’. All respect to them for having morals, but we’re here for the more cut-throat stuff.

6 Things are just very…. nice

Producers have adapted a more ‘contestant friendly’ and less exploitative approach to creating the show. Before, we might have said that reality TV shows played hard and fast with the idea of creating mayhem, uncertainty and chaos. This has been done away with on this year’s Love Island. It’s definitely a positive turn of events and is a step in the right direction regarding the psychological welfare of contestants, but some fans will surely hanker for the squirmy chaos of old.

7 Are they really looking for love?

Only a cynic would note that this year’s crop don’t have domestic bliss and wedding bells in mind as much as they have Pretty Little Thing collabs and post-show endorsements. Yes, they keep blathering on about finding The One, but it’s hard to shrug off the feeling that many of these people have an influencer/media career in their crosshairs.

8 Even the romances are boring

Exhibit A in this case: Millie and Liam, who seem very lovely but are simply too vanilla for words. J-Lo and Ben Affleck themselves could rock up to the villa and try and break them up, but we just wouldn’t be interested enough to care. We are in dire need of even a moderately viral moment. We are missing the secret spice of a character, in a similar mould to Maura Higgins, who shoots from the hip and has no shortage of one-liners. So far, Faye is the closest thing we have to a person carrying the show on their back.  

9 It’s the nature of reality TV

Most reality shows enjoy a period of fireworks before the dynamism simply fades out and the show ends its natural life cycle. By its very nature, reality TV is ephemeral, causing a splash and landing squarely in the Zeitgeist before fading out once it’s done its job.

10 Irish contestants: too little too late?

Love Island’s producers waited a full four weeks before lobbing in not one but three Irish contestants as ‘bombshells’. We have yet to see whether Belfast lad Matthew McNabb and Dubliners Salma Naran and Kaila Troy will,cause ructions in the house, but hopes are high that one of them can turn things around, and fast. Irish contestants have always held their own in reality shows, and so it goes on Love Island (heck, Greg O’Shea won the thing two years ago). They are generally charming and easy going, with an accent that immediately woos their British counterparts. When it comes to making this series one to remember, let’s just say they have a job on their hands.