Sonam Kapoor Ahuja on her relationship with fashion, life in London, and using her privilege to create meaningful change

I want to go down in posterity for the right reasons,” says Sonam Kapoor Ahuja. “When people think of me, they shouldn’t only think that I changed the way people look at fashion in India.” Reclining on a rust-red velvet sofa at her sumptuous home in London’s Notting Hill, the style icon and actor is in a philosophical mood on the day I meet her—and with good reason.

When I arrived over an hour ago, through the drizzle of an early summer’s day, she answered the door with a smile, fresh-faced and refreshingly low-key in leggings and a VegNonVeg T-shirt (from the sneaker store co-founded by her husband Anand Ahuja, along with the clothing label Bhaane). She apologised for the heart-shaped balloons that crowded her living room—a surprise from her parents on the eve of her 36th birthday—and proved to be the perfect host, fixing me a coffee and bowl of namak para as she told me about the year that was.

Like so many expats, it’s been far too long since she’s seen her family. Although she is now fully vaccinated, she tells me she had COVID-19 in December (“I was asymptomatic, thank god”), weeks before she was due to go on set for her latest film, Blind, which she describes as “an incredible experience” and “one of the toughest shoots I’ve ever done.” It’s been trying times for most of us, but she hopes the worst is behind us. As we speak, London is on the cusp of a debated complete reopening, the days are getting longer, and tomorrow she will be taking her Life in the UK Test. “I’ve been studying for a week,” she says with a laugh. In short, there’s been a lot to process and more time than usual in which to do it.

Change of pace

Be it spotting a peacock while strolling through Holland Park, vintage shopping at Alfies Antique Market or grabbing ragda patties at Bombay Bustle, Kapoor Ahuja has found her way around London, making it her second home. On sunny days she loves walking around Hampstead Heath. “You walk through Maida Vale, go through the canal, go into the park and walk up the hill with your picnic basket full of sandwiches. You can see all of London. I’m still a tourist.” The Victoria & Albert Museum is another sanctum. “There’s a bookstore opposite where I love to sit. They have really nice coffee,” she adds.

But with her pre-pandemic whirlwind of flights, meetings and red carpets disrupted, her townhouse has become the centre of her world—an oasis of hand-painted wallpaper, Indian artwork, sculptural lighting and plush furnishings that will be all too familiar to her more than 30 million Instagram followers. “I like the freedom here,” she muses. “I make my own food, clean my own space, shop for my own groceries.” It’s been the site of anxious self-isolation, but also home-cooked dinners with her husband (for which they both get dressed up) and disagreements over what to stream. “He likes to watch basketball and I want to watch The Queen’s Gambit.” And then she goes on to list his favourites: “Bad Boys [the film, starring Will Smith and Martin Lawrence], The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air [when it comes to TV shows] and he’s like, ‘Andaz Apna Apna is the greatest film ever made!’ And I’m a cinephile.”

Otherwise, the past three years of marriage have been bliss. “I’m really fortunate to have met somebody who is like-minded and a feminist,” she says with a grin. “Thank god I didn’t meet somebody who is from the same industry as me, because their world view can be very limited. It’s all about what’s happening in Bollywood.” Has anything surprised her? “This is the first year that we’ve spent every night together,” she replies. “Usually, we travel so much. I’ve realised that we’re obsessed with each other and we have a lot of fun together.”

“In fact,” she adds, “we’re often recognised together because we’re constantly holding hands.” It seems even moving halfway across the world hasn’t afforded them much anonymity. “As brown people, we’re everywhere,” Kapoor Ahuja adds. “I was in Scotland and there were Indians, Pakistanis, Bangladeshis and Middle Eastern people everywhere, and they’re all obsessed with Bollywood.” Masks have helped, but it’s her distinctive voice that gives her away. “People are like, ‘Oh, that sounds like awkward Sonam Kapoor.’ I think I sound weird.”

The good fight

The trip to Scotland was for the production of Blind, a remake of the 2011 Korean thriller about an ex-police officer who loses her eyesight and becomes embroiled in a case. To prepare for the lead role, Kapoor Ahuja immersed herself in Zoom rehearsals, fight training, and walked around the house with a blindfold on, occasionally knocking things over. They shot in the freezing cold and she recalls wearing just a leather jacket and sweater as well as white lenses that left her visually impaired. “It was intense,” she reminisces. “We were shooting until 4am and starting at 3pm. You’d wake up and have one hour of daylight.” Still, she’s immensely proud of the film and the fact that she’s both examining the experience of people who are differently abled while playing “an empowered woman”.

It’s become something of a signature for the trailblazer, who has never been afraid of pushing boundaries, from Khoobsurat (2014) and Neerja (2016) to Veere Di Wedding (2018) and Ek Ladki Ko Dekha Toh Aisa Laga (2019). She says her craft means a lot to her and, as a result, she is increasingly specific about the roles she takes on. While she acknowledges that scripts are now better in their portrayal of women, there’s still a long way to go for a more equal industry. “The pay gap is ridiculous,” she says. “It’s not changed at all. I can stand up to it, but then I don’t get those roles, and I’m ok with that. And frankly, I can afford to do that. I realised over the past two or three years that I have no right to judge anybody. I’m very privileged, so making difficult choices isn’t really f*cking difficult. I’d better be making those choices.” 

I get the sense that this Bollywood icon is considering her next chapter, wondering how best to wield her privilege, the power she’s spent the last decade accumulating, and what legacy she will leave behind. “Being a part of my husband’s work with Bhaane and VegNonVeg, working with the LGBTQI+ community, raising awareness for the hunger and malnutrition that exists in India, as well as for the disparity between the rich and poor—I don’t know, as an actor, if I’m meant to do that. Is social media the right place to talk about it? Or do I do it through my work, through a film, because it has more of an impact? Should I talk less and maybe do more? I think that’s the right way to go. Doing Ek Ladki...helped more than talking about pride month on my Instagram stories.” The other things on her mind? “Starting a family at the right time and doing more in the world of fashion and beauty.” 

Has her relationship with fashion changed over lockdown? “I’ve fallen more in love with it,” she tells me, pulling out her phone to talk me through her recent purchases: a Loewe bag made out of surplus leather (“It called to me because it wasn’t wasteful”), a Dior tote with her name on it (“I love what Maria Grazia is doing”) and high-waisted jeans from Frame (“I’ve been living in them”). “I’m buying a lot of classic things,” she explains. “I’ve stopped buying trendy things completely.” Sustainability has also been top of mind. “I’ve been shopping a lot on Vestiaire, 1stDibs and eBay, and buying H&M’s conscious clothing. Then I bought this Pangaia tracksuit and I saw eight other girls wearing the same thing.” She starts to laugh. “They were 10 years younger than me and I was like, ‘What am I doing?’”

Tale of two cities

Just as she is looking forward to swapping sweats for ball gowns soon, she yearns for the day she can travel freely between London and Mumbai again. Living in the former, she has appreciated “the parks, the quality of life, the lack of pollution, the museums” and being closer to childhood friends from boarding school. But, she says, being away from India at a time of national crisis was stressful. “Friends have lost their parents. Young people have passed away, people I know. I didn’t sleep for a month.”

She looks at me thoughtfully. “London has made me realise that I’m very Indian. I now realise what being an immigrant actually means. Migrating to a new place is hard. I didn’t understand why Indians abroad were more Indian than Indians in India, and I realised it’s because we hold on to our roots so hard. I miss Bombay—the food, my family, my friends, the traffic, the movie industry.” I tell her about my mother who felt the same way and, after almost two decades of living in the UK, returned to India. “Is she happy?” Kapoor Ahuja asks. I nod. “I plan to go back as well,” she concludes. “I love living here, but India is where my heart is.” 

Read the complete interview in Vogue India’s July 2021 issue, on stands on July 7. Subscribe here

Photographed by Mariano Vivanco. Styled by Oliver Volquardsen. Fashion direction by Priyanka Kapadia

On Sonam: Dress, Dior. Earrings, headband, rings; all David Morris 

Hair: Dayaruci. Makeup: Lisa Eldridge

Photographer’s assistants: Joe Petini; Freddie Bell. Photographer’s agency: Collective Talents Inc. Assistant stylists: Emily Powell; Anthony. Makeup assistant: Jessie Richardson. Production: Ashumi Sanghvi. Producer’s assistant: Camille George. Set designer: Josh Stovell. Set designer’s assistant: Rufus Wilkinson. Studio manager: Rosie Martin. Digital tech: Giorgio Lattanzi. Bookings editor: Prachiti Parakh

Also read:

16 pictures that prove Sonam Kapoor Ahuja is always the best dressed wedding guest 

In pictures: Sonam Kapoor Ahuja’s complete style transformation over the years

5 times Sonam Kapoor Ahuja showed you how to experiment with the sari