In the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad, Yagnyavalkya explains to Maitreyi that the self or the atma alone is very dear to each one of us, though we may think we love and care for our kith and kin, etc, and our possessions. This is because the atma swaroopa is essentially blissful and each one longs to attain this bliss.
In the grantha Satasloki, Adi Sankara alludes to the human tendency to get attached to people, objects, places, etc, and shows that this attachment is the real cause of sorrow, pointed out Sri K. Ramasubramaniam in a discourse. The acharya explains with examples to show that the self is dearer than anything else to each one of us. All objects are valued because we think they give us happiness though in reality no object can give sorrow or happiness always. Thus we shift between likes and dislikes throughout our existence. If some objects cause sorrow, they are discarded. Though one may say one’s wife, son or others are dear to him, they are not really the object of his desire. For, he will not hesitate to assert his rights and views in case differences of opinion may arise. Suppose the son refuses to act according to the wishes of his father or the wife chooses to make independent decisions that are not to one’s liking, then the choice would be to reject them in preference to his own wishes. If suppose a man’s hand is badly infected and the doctor advises amputation, the person surely will agree rather than endanger his life. He would not mind losing his hand though it had served him well until then.
The idea is that all these are dear to a person only because he thinks he derives happiness from them. Ultimately it is one’s own self that is the real object of love and not others. Everything is dear only for one’s own sake.
