I Have Discovered Which Letter Makes Car Names Funny

I’m kind of in a mood today, people, so that means you’re getting stories like this, to which some dingus in the comments will reply slow news day? or some shit like that, and I’m just going to be all, bitch, for me every day is a slow news day.

Now that we have that out of the way, I’m delighted to let you know that I have finally discovered which letter of our 27-letter alphabet (I count the ə as a letter, like George Bernard Shaw) makes car names and words funny.

That letter is “L.”

Don’t believe me? Let me show you, empirically! Please delight to these examples of adding (or replacing a letter with) an L into car names and words for big laffs:

First, the glands:

Gland National
Gland Prix
Gland Am

Now some technical terms:

Twin Clam
Clamshaft
Flour-by-Flour
Flour-Wheel Drive
Shlifter
Slupercharger
Turbol
Spleedometer

Okay, now a bunch of car names:

Clamaro
Clorvette
Cladillac Climmeron
Hondal Clivic
Toylota Clamry
Plorsche Clayman
Jelep Cherokeel
Fliat Flive Hundred
Fliat Planda
Merlcedes-Blenz Glee-Walgen
Nisslan Pulsarl
Toylota Tundral
Ferrarli Lenzo
Ferrarli Dilno
Lamblorghini Diablol
Flord Ledge
Flord Mustlang
Bluick Lelectra
Lotlus Lelan
Volkswalgen Bleetle
Volkswalgen Glof
Vlolvo Lamazon
Slaab Slonnet

I could go on, because as far as I can tell, most car names with Ls stuck in them become funny. I encourage you to try this out in the comments; Ls are free! Use all of them you want!

It’s Friday afternoon, don’t read too much into things. Just enjoy, friends. Enjoy the Ls.