Thread: GF turns off snapchat location after a year. Is this sus or am I over analyzing?

Cliffs at bottom- Apologies for the wall of text

Gf and I have been together almost a year, we've only ever had two real fights in our relationship prior to this. She's a Pre-Med Junior from a ultra Christian family, goes to a Christian private Uni and her dad is a Minister. She moved back into their house for summer break this past week because she lives in the dorms and they have no idea she basically spent the entire last semester living at my house, it was very rare she didnt spend the night with me. Bu now we wont spend the night together until August. The first few nights at her parents we didnt see each other, she was really busy with moving and work but it felt like she was slowly distancing herself from me, and I had never felt that from her before. A couple nights later she texts me goodnight at 10PM, and at 1130ish I open Snapchat while brushing my teeth and see just a few minutes ago she had opened the last chat message. I sent her a playful message about her being up too late bc she had to be up early. For the next hour I saw her keep popping on and offline but she never opens it or anything. I thought she was probably just chatting with her best friend who just had a birthday but lives in Hawaii, where its a lot earlier. We've always been able to see each others online status, so we can see when we are both online and where on the map we are. I go to bed without her ever opening the message. The next morning she laughs it off and said she only got up to go to the bathroom and was back asleep after a few min. I said thats weird bc it showed her activity status going back on and off for almost an hour and a half. She gets really upset with me, accuses me of not trusting her and calling me paranoid, I never even thought this would be an argument but i brought it up because it seemed a little suspicious. She said she woke up with her phone in her hand and almost dead, so she must have fallen asleep watching snap in bed (she does have her phone settings to not have the screen time out). But this doesnt explain why her online status turned on and off 6-8 times in the hour. She gets even more mad and said Im accusing her of infidelity and disrespecting her, even though I never directly accused her. We talk things over and its all cooled off and fine....then says she's turning off her location because I dont trust her enough and doesnt want this to be a problem again. That's even more suspicious, right? I put my foot down and say Im not cool with that, I dont like that she got questioned about it one time in almost a year and now she's throwing a tantrum and wants to disable it. She even challenged me on it saying "what will you do if I dont? are you going to throw away everything over snapchat?", she's never tried to challenge me before, she's very submissive. We've only exchanged a few cold text since, she's busy doing lab research full time on campus and we seem to be on the verge of ending things over this, she even which seems ridiculous but we talked for a few hours on the phone about it last night and got absolutely no where. It feels very surreal, just a few weeks ago she was openly talking to her mom about wanting to marry me, we've discussed marriage a few times recently and moving out of state together for her med school next year.


I have struggled with trust issues in past relationships due to sloots being sloots (even come from a small family that is generally untrusting of each other). In the beginning of this relationship I also struggled with the trust issues because there was some "unofficial overlap". She did that weak breakup with a guy without actually directly saying it move by just being ice cold in text to a guy she had been with for 3 months when he was out of town for a whole month. Long story short, she was at my place laying in bed with me a few weeks into us seeing each other and as she was showing me something on her phone, he texted her and called her a pet name. I confronted her bc she had told me she wasnt seeing or talking w other guys. She showed me the whole text convo and texted him again the next day saying to stop contacting her and that was the end of it. Only other issue was her deciding to abort an unplanned pregnancy we had despite me pleading with her not to, and her and her entire fam having ultra Christian views on it. This was the only time in the relationship I ever doubted us as a couple. Id say over the past 6 months this is the first relationship Ive had in a long time where I truly did trust someone and never questioned anything about her and overall this has been the healthiest LT relationship Ive ever had; and she has always 100% trusted me no matter what, even if other sloots have slid into my DMs, so its very disappointing that suddenly we are in this situation.

Be honest, is this a sloots gonna sloot/misc is always right situation or me still not fully trusting anyone and over analyzing?

Cliffs:
Year long relationship only 2 real issues prior to this
Initially there was trust issues bc she didnt officially end it with the last guy she was seeing until a few weeks after dating me
We had unplanned pregnancy very early on and she aborted it despite her father being a Christian Minister and me doing everything possibly to stop her
Last 6 months is healthiest relationship OP has had- a lot of mutual trust has been built, even when sloots slid in my DMs she never doubted me
Has talked to her parents about marrying me
We recently began talking about marriage and moving out of state for her to attend MD school
GF moves back in w fam for summer and feels a little distant
She goes to bed but a few hours later is on snapchat
on and offline a dozen times from 11pm-1am
I confront her, she says she went up to go to the bathroom and watched some snap tv in bed for a few minutes, and she fell asleep with her phone still on snap
I dont immediately believe her
She says I am disrespecting her and indirectly accusing her of infidelity
We talk it out, everything is fine
She decides to turn off snapchat activity so I cannot see when she's online or where on the map, says its unhealthy for us and I dont fully trust her still and cries bout it
I say I am not comfortable w that and think it makes her look more suspicious, plus her Uni is in the ghetto, numerous times she reported intoxicated homeless people threatening students on campus
Put my foot down and say I wont accept her disabling those features suddenly bc I asked her about her online activity ONE time in a year
She says "what are you going to do, break up with me over not being able to see my location?"
We have barely spoken since


I know if my friends approached me with this, Id say it looks like a red flag but part of me honestly regrets ever even making this an issue

Originally Posted by latverian41

Bro if you are in any real relationship and one or the other tries to keep things hidden fr you then I suggest you find a new relationship.

Relationships and strong marriages. A husband and wife do not keep things from one another like say two good friend's might.

A husband and wife ar suppose to be one. It's called a family. You should be able to tell your other half with anything.. there can be no doubts in marriage. If there are you are loving a lie.

Yes I agree, and told her something similar to this. her suddenly turning off those features makes it feel like she actually is hiding something. She says she's only doing it because she wants me to trust her without those features turned on. It feels like shes doing this to try to punish me for questioning her.

Originally Posted by GayCumLord

She doesn't respect you (we've all been there)
Even from the start I'm sure you'll admit you ignored the red flag that she cheated on her old boyfriend with you.
This relationship is long gone and you're going to get really hurt as this progresses if you don't just cut her off now in my opinion.

IMO dating masculine career women is setting yourself up for unhappiness but you do you

Thats the thing, she's always been very respectful towards me as a man and is very submissive with me despite being a career driven woman (I can tell she is generally not liked by either the male or female classmates though, she can be very serious and cold). She's never tried to wear the pants in the relationship until this

The only reason I gave her a second chance about the overlap is because when his text came through, she immediately said it wasnt what it looked like and showed me her entire text convo with him, even prior to meeting me and she had made it clear numerous times to him that she was not interested in seeing him again once he was back. She did let him keep pursuing though instead of going NC. I was fully prepared to tell her to kick rocks when I first saw the text from him, I had other females on the back burner I could have pursued instead.

Originally Posted by Nicklol

my oneitis had it on until she found out i was on snapchat
feelsbadman
the disrespect

Sloots get intimidated by the bubble butt brah