Rajkot: While possessiveness between partners, be it lovers or husband-wife, is considered normal but that emotional attachment too comes with its own boundaries. If the ‘clinginess’ starts to suffocate or intrude your personal space, it’s a sign of psychological problem. Such a syndrome is then labelled as ‘possessive personality disorder.’
And what better could have been than the lockdown period to discover over possessiveness — forced confinement for a long time within the four walls exposed many couples’ insecurities, reveals a survey conducted by the psychology department of Saurashtra University (SU) on 1,350 men and women during this specific period. The survey conducted by assistant professor Dimpal Ramani along with her student Krishna Kabariya in the last one year showed 85 percent of the surveyed married women over possessive, while the same sentiments were shown by 76 percent unmarried men.
According to psychologists, relationship between couples is a very delicate matter and often crosses the limit. Over possessiveness invites ownership feelings which impacts relations. There is a very thin line between protecting your partner and expressing your right over your partner, they opine.
“It’s good that somebody loves you. But over possessiveness or somebody expressing ownership over their partner induces bitterness in the relationship. When a person continues to think about the partner without any relaxation, such a psychology is termed as a mental disorder.”
“This starts with jealousy or suspicion about a partner and thereafter a person becomes insecure and slowly it reaches to it’s extreme when a partner feels discomposure and it becomes emotional harassment,” Ramani added.
Yogesh Jogsan HoD, psychology department said, “Over possessiveness is a common disorder among couples but lockdown revealed it further when couples had full access to each other’s mobile phones, WhatsApp and Facebook chats. This is a personality disorder that leaves the other partner mentally stressed. Over possessive people also try to become rough with partner’s opposite sex contacts, upset them by calling up frequently to verify his or her status etc. At this stage professional counselling is required.”