Here's how to make sure you and your child are sleeping well

“My son was a horrible sleeper and my husband and I really struggled for the first nine months,” says Ajita Gopal Seethepalli, parent of two, whose own sleep-deprivation as a new mum led her to her calling—helping others like her. She started her career as a child sleep consultant ten years ago, after educating herself in the field. “Over the course of the years and given the intimate interactions I have with mothers as a consultant, I often became a sounding board for many moms who were silently battling and suffering the harmful effects of postpartum depression or anxiety,” says Seethepalli, who then decided to further expand her knowledge in counselling and psychotherapy for women. She uses behavioural coaching to help develop healthy habits in children, and coaches new mums to develop healthy sleep habits with their young ones. Here, Seethepalli answers the questions on the minds of parents, when it comes to rest and relaxation, which will hopefully help you sleep better tonight.

Sleep—a child’s building block, a mother’s necessity

Of course, sleep is important for everyone, but especially critical for babies. “Sleep not only restores energy in infants and young ones, but also helps in physical growth, to build the body’s immune system, brain development, learning, memory and information processing capabilities and much more,” explains Seethepalli, who believes that lack of sleep deprives children of the energy they need to be well adjusted, focused, and happy children, “Often babies with sleep issues also tend to become fussy and picky eaters.”

But it is also equally important for the mother to rest, “Once the baby is born, the focus tends to shift from the mother to the infant. This is natural. But this is also the time that the mother is learning and adapting to her new role and her body is recovering from the birth,” says Seethepalli, “Sleep is known to help heal and repair the body post-delivery, and help the brain to stay calm and focused through the massive life changes. Lack of adequate sleep over a period of time is known to cause/amplify feelings of anxiety, depression, mood swings, weight gain, decrease collagen production, slow metabolism, fluctuations in blood sugar levels, lower immunity levels and much more.”

The restful sleep guide for the child

To begin with, it’s important to understand the age-appropriate sleep requirements, “Sleep pattern and amount of sleep differs based on the age of a child. New born babies, for example, need as much as 16-18 hours of sleep. A one-year old needs about 13-14 hours including night sleep and two day-naps,” says Seethepalli, whose simple tips will help you follow that routine:

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   Develop and follow a schedule.

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   Avoid keeping your baby awake for too long in the evening hoping they will sleep better at night or wake up later in the morning. This commonly tends to backfire given that overtired children generally don’t sleep well.

Sleep, where art thou?

But life isn’t always smooth sailing, especially when you have a toddler in tow who refuses to sleep. “It is important to understand why the child is not able to sleep well,” says Seethepalli, and in those moments of stress, it’s important to stay calm, “Often, we tend to get anxious and start offering all kinds of crutches like rocking, feeding, or walking to help the child to go back to sleep. When done over a period of time, these associations can become bad sleep habits resulting in multiple wake-ups and disturbed sleep for the baby and family. If a child isn’t sleeping well, mothers should work on improving age-appropriate sleep/wake schedules, and setting good routines to help the baby start developing good sleep related habits,” she explains.

“Mothers can focus on healthy eating, some daily exercise, and outdoor time,” says Seethepalli, who urges new mothers to carve out an hour or so every few days or even once a week to indulge in a little “me” time. “Yoga and meditation is also very helpful in helping moms find calm and peace for precious moments in a day,” she concludes.

Ajita Gopal Seethepalli is a child sleep and behavioural habits consultant and a maternity mental health counsellor and the founder of KidsCenter.i

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