Vandana Sharma (Age 76) has no time for anyone, and would much prefer that you didn’t call her. A career educationist having run three schools, she is now actively setting up an online psychological counselling platform along with her daughter and business partner Ria, and busy helping young minds manage contours of urban family life. Vandana lost her husband 9 years back and proudly stays alone in posh Defence Colony. Ria manages all the business dynamics remotely out of Sydney, where she lives with her husband and their nine-year-old son.
An avid writer, she loves the creative midnight hours and is now busy finishing her third book – a fictional love story set in the Mughal era. If you do want to catch her attention, you better be young (at heart), energetic, and up to something fascinating in life. Vandana could change your fortunes, and a mere mention of her name on your advisory board, and her deep wisdom collected over five decades of life experiences, can be the difference between a successful and a failed startup.
“Young India” continues to grab headlines across both national and international media and remains a topic of fixation amongst policymakers, economists and movers and shakers of our society. But this “Young India” irrespective of its dynamic growth tales and promises of unprecedented success, represents only a part of India’s diverse demographic landscape. Every community neighbourhood across the country today, has Vandana and Ria, traversing and re-imagining life, managing home, health, employment and hassles of daily life.
It is estimated that by 2050, there will be more people older than 60 years than those below 15 years and the share of the population over the age of 60 is projected to increase from 8% in 2019 to nearly 20% in 2050 according to UNFPA. Ageing is inevitable, but the outlook towards ageing is something that we as a society create and define. While expressions such as ‘fine aged wine’ find their way on greeting cards and celebratory toasts, reports and studies continue to focus on the more morbid aspects of physical and mental health deterioration, social isolation etc. While these remain real and vital concerns, they in no way define the phenomena of ageing which comprises of a myriad of emotions and hues much beyond the stereotypical ‘grey’.
Ageing is a privilege earned only after weathering the harshest storms, experiencing the steepest uphill climbs and successfully reaching the other end of the age spectrum to stand tall as a survivor, take stock of one’s well-earned achievements and bask in the glory of the wisdom and knowledge collected along the way. Traditionally, as part of the Indian culture, the elders are viewed as the very foundation of a family and society at large. In villages, the ‘panchayat’ model continues to function with the village elders bestowed with the responsibility to uphold the value system and guide the younger generation as they navigate through life’s challenges. The decision of the ‘panch’ or the elders is considered as the final word and reflects the younger generation’s deep-rooted respect and belief in the wisdom earned by the elders by virtue of their life experiences.
Even in urban India, the ivy –league educated new mother, despite reading a host of new-age parenting books and blogs, always seeks the guidance of her mother or mother-in-law as she navigates the world of parenthood. There is an implicit understanding that elders have a wealth of life experiences to share and over 3 decades of before and after comparisons to now finally have a much better handle of this roller coaster ride called parenting. The traditional home remedies find their way in the youngest and modern homes and grandmothers are always on speed dial when the child coughs or sneezes during those dreaded flu months. The pandemic further highlighted the trust and confidence that the younger generation places in the advice and guidance of the more experienced elders. Covid-19 saw many young couples and even students who were staying away from parents, reaching out to the elders in the family for those traditional concoctions that help build immunity. None of these come with any FDA approved certificates, but carry the stamp of unconditional trust and knowledge arduously gained through the years.
While the arrival of the recently graduated younger generation is eagerly awaited to take over the reins of the family business, the head of the family often continues to hold the position of Chairman or Advisor to the Board. The young dynamic CEO is able to floor the investors with his newly learnt strategy jargons, but he still seeks the guidance and support of his father and grandfather to navigate the day to day operations and understand the more subtle cultural cues and nuances of running a family business in India. No college has ever listed a course on ‘life experiences’ because the only way to earn this wealth of knowledge is by actually living it! Hence it comes as no surprise that most Indian start-ups with young, dynamic and ambitious founders are often guided by seasoned elderly mentors who bring with them the wealth of first-hand experiences and unparalleled industry knowledge. They might not be adept at using the latest technology but are able to offer unmatched insight on the basics of creating a sound foundation for longevity and success that can weather the storms that every business is bound to face at some point during their growth phase.
The urban elderly are also gradually becoming more aware of their treasure chest of life experiences and are learning to harness its power to continue to lead a meaningful and fulfilling life. Whether it is mentoring programmes or business ventures such as grandmother’s pickles or a yoga class or even a simple value education class for children, the elderly are learning to marry their unique gift of life experiences with the gap in society to continue to add value to themselves and society at large. Like I mentioned earlier, ageing is inevitable but the outlook towards it remains a choice we make as a society. While being young is associated with a specific age, the term ‘youthful’ is bound by no age limitations other than our state of mind. We, along with the elders in our society, decide whether we want to view them as weak dependents or experienced ‘youthful’ contributors to life and society. And as this end of the age spectrum continues to grow and expand, it becomes imperative to address India’s limited understanding of the privilege that accompanies ageing and make a sustained effort to harness the power of invaluable experience and life lessons. As the restless and ambitious young India continues to create new benchmarks of success, the more patient and seasoned elders offer the ideal foundation that promises rigour and sustainability. Together, they have the potential to take India to the next frontier.
By Saumyajit Roy
(The writer is a Founder, Emoha Elder Care. Views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of India.com. The writer is solely responsible for any claims arising out of the contents of this article).