We made up punny names for New Jersey marijuana dispensaries to cope with election anxiety
Listen, it's been a long 24 hours.
As of early Monday morning, there was no clear winner in the 2020 presidential election. We might get an answer today? Who knows. Will democracy survive? LOL, I mean maybe?
But we do know that New Jersey voted to legalize recreational marijuana, along with a number of other states with weed on the ballots. Then we saw this tweet.
Every single dispensary in New Jersey is going to be called, like, Da Wise Guys or Goodfellaz, and it’s gonna be a whole lot of fun.
— willy 💧 (@willystaley) November 4, 2020
Our broken, exhausted, internet-poisoned brains latched onto this idea. We needed something else to think about. And if you're feeling overwhelmed, tired, and stressed as hell, I recommend making some dumb Jersey dispensary puns. As a Sopranos loving workplace, we almost immediately started firing off Sopranos/generic Italian-American nonsense puns in our Slack.
Some of the early 'Sopranos' puns.
Image: Screenshot :mashable
The brilliance of Bada Bong. Amazing. I then added my personal favorite:
Image: Screenshot :mashable
From then, we were off to the races. Things soon moved to another Jersey icon: Bruce Springsteen.
Our Boss dispensary ideas included:
Buds Springsteen
Dankness on the Edge of Town
Dancing in the Dank
Tenth Avenue Smoke Out
The Stoned Pony
A Spliff in July, Asbury Park
Glory Daze
Then onto Jersey boy Jon Bon Jovi:
Jon Bong Jovi
Bon Joint-vi
Bad Medicine
Zooted, Dead or Alive
And if people in Jersey love anything, they love The Godfather:
An Offer You Can't Refuse
Horse Head in Bud
The Budfather
Leaves and Bud, Take the Doobie (yes, this is a major stretch)
We also did even more basic Italian/Sopranos nonsense:
BAKED ziti
Paulie gualtieREEFER
KUSHamanos
Are You Tokin' to Me
And then some general Jersey Things (TM):
Hashbury Park
New Jersey Lit Rail
Budgers University
The Joint
It's Actually a Really Lovely State With a Great Coast OK?!? Weed
Anyway, that was how we passed the time this morning and redirected energy as everything hung in the balance. It was nice. Maybe do the same? Or at least have a few laughs while you can — it's going to be a long couple of days.
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