Dean Laidley and the struggles coaches face after the siren sounds

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Dean Laidley and the struggles coaches face after the siren sounds

It was the day after the Brownlow Medal count when Dean Laidley, no longer coaching in the AFL, spoke to a group of fellow coaches about the challenges of transitioning out of what they call the "AFL system".

Laidley, who had moved to work as a leadership consultant after finishing up as an assistant coach at Carlton in 2015, was addressing a coaching seminar attended largely by AFL assistant coaches on the issue of how he had coped with the aftermath of leaving the elite level of the game.

Former North Melbourne coach Dean Laidley.Credit:Sebastian Costanzo

Mark Brayshaw, the chief executive of the AFL Coaches Association who had known Laidley from Brayshaw's stint on North Melbourne's club board, can't recall whether this was grand final week of 2016 or 2017. But he hasn't forgotten Laidley's message.

Laidley, in Brayshaw's recollection, shared: "Here's what happened to me. I was in football for a long, long while and it took me a while to find my feet." Laidley told the coaches not to underestimate the knowledge they had accrued.

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Today, it has occurred to many within that same oft-suffocating AFL universe, that Dean Laidley is far from the only ex-senior coach who has fallen from greats heights, in the manner of the protagonist in Greek tragedy.

Barely two years before Laidley was arrested on a stalking charge and photographed dressed as a woman, the former Geelong and Essendon coach Mark "Bomber" Thompson was charged with drug offences and while he evaded jail, the two-time premiership coach was forced to admit to a drug problem and that a convicted criminal had been living in his Port Melbourne abode, where ice was found.

Last year, football mourned Danny Frawley after the genial "Spud" drove into a tree outside Ballarat, ramping up the conversation about mental health for coaches, Frawley having been public about this struggles.

James Hird is another coach who, while enduring the slings and arrows of the Essendon drug saga during his coaching, encountered significant and dangerous mental demons later.

There's little argument within the game that the pressures that the senior coach faces, exacerbated by social media and the 24-7 media cycle, is nonpareil within AFL.

If Laidley, Thompson, Frawley and Hird are vastly different people with unique circumstances, it is noteworthy that each of them encountered their difficulties once the music ceased and they were without one of those coaching chairs.

"You get in this environment where you get this big endorphin hits and these dopamine hits from playing footy and winning and succeeding and achieving," said Carlton coach David Teague.

You take that away and I think players and coaches, it's something they can struggle [with] if they don't have enough purpose in life.

David Teague

"And then you leave that environment and ... you probably miss the bonds from the relationships.

"You take that away and I think players and coaches, it's something they can struggle [with] if they don't have enough purpose in life."

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Brayshaw and Teague expressed concern that the financial crisis facing the AFL and anticipated cut backs in staff – including many assistant coaches – would place an even greater burden on the senior coach.

Conversely, Teague's old coach at North and Carlton, Denis Pagan, felt that the number of staff underneath the main coach had made his job more difficult, that it could well be easier with fewer answering to him. That said, Pagan observed of the coach's lot: "It was always hard but it's a bit tougher now."

Another possibility to ponder is that coaching draws certain types of personalities – intense, driven figures who don't necessarily maintain work-life balances, and that full-bore professionalism has removed the opportunity for coaches to escape into another job.

Brayshaw noted that senior coaches tended to be the kind of men who were reluctant to seek help, worrying "about themselves last and everybody else first."

As Laidley's fall follows Thompson's and co, perhaps the coaching game, too, will be facing a transition to a kinder, gentler world.

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