Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
I recently found out that my boyfriend has been meeting his ex-girlfriend whenever I am not in town. My work involves a lot of travel, so I am away at least once a month, and my friends have seen him out with her. I confronted him about this and he didn't deny it. He says they are still good friends and meet when I'm not around because he thinks it will be awkward for me to meet her. He swears there is nothing going on, and I don't know if I can believe him because he should have just been honest about meeting her in the first place. If he has nothing to hide, why would he meet her when I am not in town?
He was wrong, obviously, because this does make him seem as if he has something to hide. Choosing to believe him depends upon the kind of relationship you have though. Do you have any specific reason for assuming he is lying? Has he given you any reason to doubt him in the past? Have the two of you had a conversation about his ex-girlfriend that would lead him to assume you have a problem with him meeting her? If they really are good friends, would you consider the possibility of going out with them and talking about this? I suggest you think about these things first before telling him how you feel about this.
Should I be honest with my boyfriend at the risk of hurting his feelings or simply lie to help this relationship? I don't want to lose him, and being honest may be a problem because he may not want to be with me anymore.
I'm afraid you're going to have to be a little more specific. White lies are common, obviously, but I have no idea of what you intend to lie about or what the possible consequences of this lie may be. Honesty is always great for any relationship in the long run, because that alone builds trust.
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