Dear madam,

It is too much only. This election-election all day with TV channels shouting and everyone getting excited has made me into fully nervous wreck.

As such I am not having good speed on computer but with so much angry noise like giant buzzing bee everywhere in housing colony, my hand started to shake and I am making many typing mistakes. Olden days I was using correction pen to erase mistakes but nowadays everything is easy on computer. Nobody will even know you made mistake. Life itself has become like that, madam, I am noticing. Easy to speak anything and erase and keep speaking. Like that sadhu woman.

Pineapple olan

My second son — the one who works from home and god knows why this is making that old-fashioned Mathrubootham very angry — he told me, amma, make some pineapple olan, it will make you feel better. Which is what I did and indeed, madam, it instantly made me so cheerful I was singing old Jayalalithaa song ‘Aasai Irukku Nenjil Aasai Irukku’ while loading washing machine.

Sadly, my son got urgent phone call and went out and never came back for lunch. But this week I am planning pineapple olan as my Ladies Club Demo Dish, it is tasting very good. Last month, they somehow overlooked sending me notice. Some typing mistake they said. But this week I have already found out date and venue so no chance mistake. Between you and me, madam, these ladies are behaving very useless. Without me telling them do like this, do like that, they will do nothing, madam. Full zero in organising.

I am thankfully having some experience in such matters so all in all I have to take too much responsibility in Ladies Club, Building Society, Kitchen Garden Association, and what not. It is making me very busy but will Mathrubootham understand? He will fight with upstairs lady means how she will agree for giving bonsai demo next meeting? She has stopped giving me plant cuttings also. I wanted one Madurai malli cutting very badly so yesterday I have given her one thriving red rose plant, the one Mathrubootham got from Ooty Garden Fair. It is okay. Possibly he will overlook. I am putting another pot in the gap.

Periya masterchef

I am thinking of small plan, madam. What if I go on one alone holiday myself? Usually Mathrubootham wants to accompany. I also avoid because he makes kitchen full mess whenever alone. Many times I have told him to cook simple items for which full training I have given. But whether he will listen? He thinks he is periya masterchef, making pavakkai pitlai and what not. Brown mess sticking to bottom of all my cooking utensils. And kitchen looking like Kurukshetra battlefield in Mahabharata TV serial. He has broken my karandis, cutting knife, and even cutting board.

Anyway, Mrs. Balaraman came for visit this morning. She likes to drink filter coffee at sharp 11 a.m. I always keep decoction ready. She is informing me excellent news. It seems there is now one cave in Himalayas for one person stay. Only ₹990. I have told my son to make immediate enquiries. He is getting worried. What amma, you’re becoming sanyasin?

No, madam, nothing like that. Mrs. Balaraman has explained everything. It is only looking little serious but actually having full facilities — Wi-Fi, phone, mattress, pillow, three times food and one waiter. You can do light meditation. Some light posing. Some light walking. It is very good bargain. Moreover, two people not allowed in cave. What more I can ask for?

Yours solitarily,

Mrs. Mathrubootham