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There is something very bizarre with how my girlfriend behaves with me. We have been together for a year now, and I can't figure out what she wants. On the one hand, nothing I do makes her happy. She is always fighting with me about the smallest things, which is tiresome because it feels as if she doesn't want this to work. At the same time, she often asks if we should move in together because she wants our relationship to evolve. I don't see how it can evolve if we can't even see eye to eye on the little things. I don't want to move in with her until we get to a better place. How do I explain this to her without it leading to another fight?
Moving in together is a big responsibility and you're right to take your time if you don't feel that the two of you are in the same space yet. Arguments are normal, because couples take a while to figure out what they like and dislike about each other, as well as how to deal with each other's moods. If your girlfriend wants this to evolve without understanding that you're not comfortable with the way things are, neither of you will benefit from living together. A year may simply not be enough for everyone to take that step, and you shouldn't until you are comfortable enough to consider it. If explaining this to her leads to a big fight, you can simply point out that it is part of the problem. She needs to understand that you will both have to feel equally strongly about this to make it work, if she doesn't want to damage this.
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