Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
I have been in love with an older man for a while now. We have spent a lot of time together, and he knows how I feel about him, but he has been dating someone for almost two years and has no intention of leaving her for me. We all meet together very often, and I don't know if she suspects that I have feelings for him. At the same time, he encourages me to meet him and likes spending time with me, so I don't know if this is because he intends to go out with me at some point. I don't know if I should just come right out and ask him directly. What if he says I have misinterpreted his actions? That may be embarrassing for us both. What do you suggest I do?
If you are in doubt, always ask. This is someone older and there may be messages lost in translation. You may be misreading a few things, or reading too much into simple signs of friendship. If he is dating someone, what makes you assume he wants you around as a back-up plan of sorts? Is it fair for you to hope his current relationship will end, given that you spend time with his girlfriend too? Why wait around looking for clues when you can simply ask him what his intentions are? After all, he already knows how you feel about him.
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