Years ago when I was young, my parents took care of me, gave me good education and a beautiful wedding. When I lost my husband, they provided me with a home and loving care.
My mother never wanted to retire. She owned a store and ran it for 60 years. She did what she wanted and died two days after locking the door at the store. She did it her way.
She was 80 and we helped her with small things, like buying her clothes and taking. her to the doctors. She even went for chemo treatments in Boston and we drove her back to the store and she went back to work. She was remarkable and taught me to be strong. My dad had a stroke and was in rehab in Boston for a year and when he came home, we took care of him. My sister, Janice and I took turns, I brought him to my house several days a week and had a room just for him. We took him to beautiful restaurants and even to Newport on Thanksgiving. This was all done for our parents with love and joy. My sister lived and worked in Boston but came home weekends to take care of our parents.
But today it is different, people move away from their parents for jobs because they need to earn a good living for their families.
But we now have senior living apartments. Since I am now a senior (which I cannot believe) I am living in these apartments.
We have a nice apartment, where we still can be very independent. We can cook, watch television, go on the computer and relax.
During the day, we can go play Bingo (which I don't like to do) or watch the big television and talk to our neighbors. We all have our stories, some are heartbreaking. But we all listen to each other and cope. We keep busy and laugh about funny things that are happening and the good things in our lives.
We have a friend who is 101 and she told me she lost some of her independence when she stopped driving at 100. I also have seen her son picking her up in a convertible with the top down and off she went. She dances, looks beautiful and goes to the YMCA. She is an inspiration to all of us.
We had a Valentine party and I danced away, and next week a St. Patrick's party with corned beef and cabbage and music. With these activities our sons and daughters don't have to worry about us.
We even have nurses to check on us and make doctor's appointments. We also have a laundry room to wash our clothes.
I have noticed lately that sons and coming to visit their mothers on weekends. There is one man who is a complete caregiver for his 95-year-old mother.
You make a lot of friends and visit each other.
My future will be to go back to Westport where I lived half of my life. My church is there, my friends and family. So I am on a list for an apartment in Westport where they have places like this where I am living.These apartments are under HUD and the rent is according to your income.
Just because you are a senior, you don't have to give up. Life has so many wonderful things to do. I plan on returning to school, continue my photography and write a book. So I am not giving up. I am a thespian and have acted my way through the bad times in my life but enjoyed the wonderful times in my life.
Joanne Mailloux Murphy
Fall River