Given its falling ratings, with its 2018 edition having been the least viewed in history, the Oscars has seemingly become the Microsoft Bing of Hollywood award shows. Its most recent spate of misfortunes includes the pulling out of Kevin Hart as host of the 91st Academy Awards, followed by the announcement that there would be no host, and then most recently, a kerfuffle over a decision to cut certain award categories from the broadcast of the show (presenting them during commercial breaks, the lifeblood of any television event) that the academy was forced to back-pedal on after mass, er, celebrity protests by directors, actors, cinematographers and other industry technicians.

However, being nominated for an award is still a life-changing moment for the chosen few, and all of them surely must have their eyes on the prize, and I don’t mean a hunk of gold-plated tin alloy named for its vague resemblance to some old white guy’s uncle. The “gift bag”, handed out to every nominee for the year, contains a litany of things that would rival a billionaire and very wasteful person’s bucket list.

This year’s bag of goods has 50 things, and nary a shade of grey in sight. The items include a week-long Greek beachfront escape, a luxury small-ship adventure (choice of Amazon, Galapagos, Iceland or Costa Rica-Panama voyages), handcrafted absinthe, a spa kit for your mouth, a color changing lipstick, cannabis facial moisturizer and cannabis facial oil, a week at a luxury wellness resort, a field-to-table dinner in Mexico, and more bizarrely things like a Mister Poop Emoji Plunger (do not even want to know that is), and the curiously named Beauty Book for Brain Cancer by Darren Tieste.

There are 40 other items in this year’s “gift bag” (hopefully you appreciate the air quotes now), including several other vacations, beauty and rejuvenation treatments and products, and most impressively, a Wall Street Journal magazine with a free subscription card.

So yeah, maybe don't feel so bad for Leonardo Di Caprio winning his first Oscar after six nominations; we're sure he was just fine. Maybe he took a trip or three, while thouroughly hydrated, to take his mind of things. We wonder who organized it.

You can check out the full list here.