God, that’s funny! Why church signs are going viral in Mumbai

‘Invest in God... Our banking has failed’. This pithy message popped up outside St Andrew’s Church on Mumbai’s Hill Road when l’affaire Nirav Modi unfolded last year. And when rains lashed the city in June, ‘Never ask for lighter rain, just pray for a better umbrella’ read the wisdom board outside Mount Carmel Church in Bandra. St Michael’s Church in Mahim even caught the football fever with a picture of the holy chalice captioned ‘The Original World Cup’.



Sometimes you find humour in places you least expect, and Mumbai’s punladen church signboards have their own way of handing out folksy wisdom and unexpected laughs to people passing by.


Contrary to the mundane bulletin boards of yore featuring service timings, weekly events or trite quotations, these tongue-in-cheek church billboards are meant to lure younger faithful into the pews, or simply put a smile on people’s faces. And the more trendy the wisecracks, the more likely are they to spiral into social media fame.

Father Clifton Lobo, 69, belongs to the city’s band of witty church board writers. Now assistant to the Orlem parish priest in Malad, Fr Clifton’s wordplay on St Michael’s church board has often found pride of place on Facebook and Instagram. “I’m all right brain, and that’s where humour lives,” smiles the portly priest known for sassy messages like ‘I thank God I don’t need a permit for the holy spirit’.

Another faceless, nameless social media sensation is the silver-haired Mohan Roche, 71, whose irreverent posts at St Andrew’s Church often fly in the face of traditional views people expect from a place of worship. He has seen a politician and some older parishioners raise a cry now and then but Mohan isn’t afraid of conservatives or controversy. “If you’re not getting through to the youth, it’s useless. When you make religious teachings enjoyable, you become relatable,” he says. Sample this: ‘Why pay for GPS? God gives directions for free.’ Odil Madeira, 64, who inherited the duty of writing the Mahim church board after Fr Clifton moved to Orlem, was contemplating a new message when TOI visited her home, the same week that the Sabarimala temple shut down for ritual “purification” after two women entered the shrine. “How about, ‘Everyone is welcome here, including young women’?” she muses but is apprehensive. “Sounds too direct? Maybe we should say: ‘This temple is purified all year round’. It’s subtle and nobody can raise a finger,” she smiles adding, “I’m uber careful about hurting anyone’s sentiments.”

For Odil, author of two children’s poetry books, these witticisms are her way of “giving back” to the parish. She is behind trending updates like ‘No quotas in heaven. All equal in God’s sight’ during the Maratha quota stir.

Though the trend for witty signs has been inspired by churches in the United States, in Mumbai the Church of Our Lady of Rosary in Dockyard was one of the first to do so. Soon after, other churches followed.

The city’s church board writers have their own formulas for success. “It must be short, topical, and humorous enough to catch people’s attention at a traffic signal,” says Fr Clifton. Odil’s mantra is: “Avoid being verbose or holier than thou”.