A friend of mine was immensely gifted in childhood. Any game or sport he played, he always came out a winner.
Even as a child, the physical trainer in his school recommended to the Principal that the child had talent which must be encouraged. Yet while those around my friend recognised this, sadly, his father thought otherwise and chided my friend, telling him sport would get him nowhere.
With no encouragement from his father, my friend, slowly with time, lost his edge and became what people called ‘mediocre’. He went on to study engineering as forced on him by his father. Being a reluctant student, he barely finished his education and was employed in a low-paying job.
His mother passed on and his father grew old. Soon, my friend left his father and moved to another town. When his father was ill, my friend did not visit him, and though asked to by friends, he refused saying his father had throughout his growing years made him feel inadequate and incompetent, and therefore he had little affection for him.
As I write this piece, I remember people not for what they have said or done to me, but always for how they have made me feel.
Those who have shown love, care, and warmth I remember with fondness and gratitude, and those that have made me feel less I recall with fear and possibly anger too.
Maya Angelou, American civil rights activist and poet, said these words and they are so true for me: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
The writer is an organisational and behavioural consultant. He can be contacted at ttsrinath@gmail.com