A savage place: Andaman tribals don’t know what they’re missing by cutting themselves off from us

Two Dilliwalas having a chat about recent happenings.

1^st Dilliwala: These Andaman tribals who are said to have killed that American tourist who landed up on their island are a really savage lot.

2^nd Dilliwala: They sure are. Imagine, cutting themselves off totally from the outside world. No wonder they remain savages.

1^st Dilliwala: Anyway, give me some good news for a change.

2^nd Dilliwala: Well, the good news is that the air quality in Dilli is going to be Very Poor today.

1^st Dilliwala: Dilli’s air quality is going to be Very Poor today? How is that good news?

2^nd Dilliwala: It’s good news because Dilli’s air quality yesterday was Terrible, and Very Poor is an improvement on Terrible.

1^st Dilliwala: I guess it is. What other good things have been happening?

2^nd Dilliwala: Let’s see. Oh, yes. Doctors are saying that there’s going to be an epidemic of dengue this winter in the city.

1^st Dilliwala: Dengue epidemic? That’s good news?

 2^nd Dilliwala: It is, compared to last year when it was an epidemic of chikungunya. I’d rather get dengue than chikungunya any day.

1^st Dilliwala: I suppose so would I. Anything else?

2^nd Dilliwala: Nothing much. Except that there were three road rage incidents in which one person was killed and two others were hospitalised.

1^st Dilliwala: Three road rage incidents? Wow. That must be a record. Normally there are at least five or six times as many. How come there were only three?

2^nd Dilliwala: Could be because some political party had declared a bandh, and with everything shut, there was hardly any traffic on the roads.

1^st Dilliwala: Oof, oh. The papers should stop reporting such things. They’ve become such a repeated bore, no? But coming back to those savages in the Andamans. I really feel sorry for them, missing out on all the benefits of civilisation …