Defying gender roles during Chavath

Festivals bring families together; and while everyone does their best, there’s blurring of gender defined roles in today’s festivities. Men are seen cooking, while women get creative with decorations, or play traditional instruments. NT BUZZ finds out more

Danuska Da Gama & Sachi Naik I NT BUZZ

People in Goa are still revelling in the festivities of Ganesh Chaturthi. While many have celebrated the one and half days and five-day Ganehs festivities, there are families that celebrate for seven, nine and eleven days, while the mandals celebrate the community or sarvajanik Ganesh for 15 days and 21 days.

During this time everyone in the household can be seen doing something or the other. Family members have various roles to play, sometimes men get working in the kitchen and women take to making decorations and even playing instruments.

 

Roles defined, but everyone helps

Men generally are the ones who have to do all the shopping and take care of the matoli, choosing/buying the idol and getting the decorations ready. The mother always hands over a list of items required for the religious formalities and other necessary things that would be needed in the house for the festival. My wife would be happy to see me help out in the kitchen everyday of the year, but it is during this festival that men do their part. There are many dishes to be prepared and the number of women in the kitchen has decreased, so without hesitation we enter the space to help out. Of course women like to do things their way, and have the knack, so sometimes we aren’t as efficient as they are. We have to be porters, servers, and there’s no job too small. If women today work like men, there’s no reason why men can’t do chores or share the responsibility of ladies.”

— Rajeev Narvekar, assistant professor, Siolim/Porvorim

 

Women love and enjoy what they do

Ours is a joint family and everyone does their bit. However, it is understood that women are the bosses in the kitchen while the men look after the overall decoration, finances and procuring things required. We start planning for the festival much in advance and our main job is the decoration. Every year we come up with innovative ideas. This year we have used 102 kilograms of jute, made 2500 plaits to decorate the house and where the idol is placed. We can’t do this alone, and this is where the women’s role comes in. They love to be part of making the decoration, and also suggest some brilliant ideas. It is easy for them to make plaits but we can’t do it at their speed. They can easily step into our role and do all that we do, all they need is appreciation. Four ladies manage the kitchen well. They plan what’s to be cooked for food and what is to be served to the boys who come home for aarti. We don’t interfere in that, though they would like us to come in the kitchen and even wash vessels. They would get great joy seeing us do what they do on a daily basis. But, the men can always be seen helping. Times have changed and so have mindsets.”

— Deepak Parab, banker, Guirim

 

Women moving out of the kitchen

I think the major change is a journey from the kitchen to outside. Earlier the women of the house were confined to the kitchen preparing food for the entire family. The men would be busy in decorations, aarti, puja, etc. The position as to puja hasn’t really changed anywhere, but women no longer find peace in being in the kitchen only. They know how to manage their time. Many families today hire cooking services from outside while everyone takes part in the celebrations in unity.”

— Anwesha Singbal, publisher, Margao

 

Cooking during Ganesh for 10 years

During Ganesh Chaturthi, I cook meals on all days for the Naik family from Comba for over a decade. There are many dishes that I have to prepare here. Apart from me, there are only the ladies in the kitchen who I see cooking. Since I prepare food for them during Ganesh Chaturthi, I do not get an opportunity to cook in my own kitchen for my Chaturthi. The stereotyping of only ladies cooking in the kitchen is long gone. I cook food in temples too and today most of the chefs are men.”

— Mukund Prabhu, chef, Margao

 

Girls encouraged to undertake tasks usually done by men

Mostly, I am always busy with fireworks, but I do some tasks such as welcoming guests, serving them, and helping my father and uncles in decoration, tying up the Matoli, sorting nave (paddy) among others. One major stereotype that our family has broken is that of singing the aarti, where all my female cousins partake in the singing with the men in the house. They sing and play all kinds of instruments like shamel, ghumat, taso. All men in the family encourage them to play the instruments as well.”

— Damodar Naik, student, Margao

 

Empowerment begins at home

I witnessed my sisters-in-law at my husband’s home performing aarti which is usually done only by men in Goa. I felt really proud of the moment and that women are really getting empowered. It is the need of an hour to break off this stereotype that only men should perform aarti. Today, women go out work, men manage homes; so why not change these minor lifestyle rules too?”

— Gargi Lotlikar Verlekar, lecturer, Margao