The Intelligence Quotient (IQ) was evolved as a somewhat standardised attempt to measure human intelligence. It aims at quantifying a person’s reasoning ability, and is usually represented with a number that is then compared to the person’s peers in his/her age group. A simpler take: it is a ratio between a person’s mental age and chronological age expressed as a percentage.
Now I wouldn’t normally write about IQ because I don’t let other people’s stupidity affect me. Like with friends and their depressions, I simply sidestep it. Trouble is, the general low IQ costs me in time, which is my most precious non-renewable resource ever. Which is why I had to apply myself to deconstructing it. Read on and see if you agree.
Just like energy can neither be created nor destroyed, IQ too is a universal constant. Which means two very bad things are happening to the world we live in. As the overall number of people alive on the planet increases (thanks to medical advancements), the total IQ redistributes itself to accommodate the newer members of civilisation, thereby leading to everyone getting lesser than the previous generation. Otherwise put, the average IQ is dropping faster than lead in water.
Another thing that is affecting overall intelligence is that some of us are extremely bright. No, not you; some of us. These luminaries are as smart, if not smarter, than Da Vinci or Newton were for their times. So for every extra bright person we have thrust upon society today, a significant chunk of the population has to drop to levels of IQ where peanut packets need to carry ‘Contains Nuts’ warnings, wet floors marked slippery and hot coffee, as hot. Clearly, unlike energy, IQ does not transfer from one body to another, not without significant losses followed up with a promise to drink less the next weekend.
The next thing IQ (inversely) derives from is the law of motion, which states that anything in motion will continue to do so unless acted upon by an external force. With low IQ, it keeps going lower, and the force required to stop it is something even Sisyphus would walk away from.
Einstein defined the difference between genius and stupid by simply stating that genius still has its limits. A low IQ spirals downwards endlessly till it destroys not only itself but, just like a black hole, everything in its vicinity too. Stupidity isn’t contagious; it is lethal even at a distance. A person with low IQ is worse than a murderer because stupidity always racks up a higher body count. Between Vietnam and Iraq, history, and stupidity, has repeated itself.
Finally, IQ connects to idioms, and a very simple one defines this behaviour. Stupidity attracts, seduces, and breeds stupidity. Birds of a feather don’t just flock together, they wipe out other species in the process. The only way to combat low IQ is solitary confinement. Don’t feel too bad about this, I am sure a study can prove that dumb people feel less pain than say a trapped wildebeest, so no harm in locking them up and throwing away the key. Or leave the key right there, it’s not like they will figure out a way to escape.
If you can’t keep up with these definitions and rules, then consider this permanent exemption from all future IQ tests.
This column is for anyone who gives an existential toss.