Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
I joined a yoga class a few months ago, where I met a beautiful lady. I was attracted to her, so I sent her flowers and chocolate without mentioning my name. She found out it was me though, and discussed this with our yoga teacher while smiling. That same night, I received a call from some guy. I didn't take it, but saved the number. Recently, the WhatsApp account associated with that number displayed an intimate photograph of this lady with a guy. She didn't give me any inclination about reciprocating my feelings, but she was perfect for me. I am already 33 years old and can't stop thinking about her. I don't want to just give up on her. She is a good person and I don't want to humiliate her in any way. I love her. How did things end up like this?
— Debasis B
I'm not sure what you mean about how things ended up like this. The lady in question is aware of how you feel, and is presumably in a relationship with someone, who also predictably has a problem with you professing an interest in his partner. She has given you every possible clue that she is not interested, and it doesn't seem as if things will change, so where does the question of humiliating her arise? Also, what do you mean about not giving up on her, considering she has given no indication of responding to you in a positive manner? You don't know her, have no interaction with her outside this yoga class, and assume you love her based on this brief connection alone. I suggest you evaluate this realistically and be honest with yourself.
How do I tell a colleague that I want to get to know her a little better without coming across as a creep?
This depends entirely upon your ability to communicate like a calm person and ask her out for coffee, as opposed to behaving like a villain in a Bollywood film.
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