Recently, I was driving to an appointment when my phone rang. The caller said, “Doc, I just parked my car on the side of the bridge and I’m going to jump off.” Luckily, I was only five minutes away and was able to get there in time to talk him down. Unfortunately, the outcomes don’t always have a happy ending like this.
After the deaths of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain, there’s been a lot of attention focused on suicide prevention. The information out there on how to reduce suicide and help suicidal individuals is plentiful and needed. A lot has been said about mental illnesses like depression and bipolar disorder, which no doubt increases someone’s risk of suicide. There are some more basic beliefs and daily behaviors that need to be addressed, because if not, the suicide epidemic is going to get much worse.
A skewed perception of reality
One of the most significant problems most people suffer from is the delusion of happiness. There’s no such thing as a world of unicorns and rainbows as portrayed on television and on social media. We see images and stories of the perfect family living the perfect life and become brainwashed that life is supposed to be this utopia where no real problems exist. It’s simply not true and it’s pushing many people to suffer from constant feelings of lack, fear and depression. What fantasies are running inside your head? Start looking at the world the way it really is.
Stressful western lifestyle
Many of us constantly struggle to meet the ever-increasing demands of business, family, success, life balance and personal fulfillment. We have so much going on that we can’t keep up. Our bodies are running on fumes, devouring fast-food and downing coffee and energy drinks, cutting back on sleep and exercise, and desperately trying to squeeze more and more into our already hectic schedules. The stress is so much that it’s causing metabolic breakdowns that are pushing us over the edge. The body simply can’t keep up, and for some, suicide is an attractive escape to put an end to the insanity and never-ending rat race. We need to adopt more of an Eastern philosophy, one that recognizes the inner world of a human being that leads to better mental and physical health and true authentic living.
More compassion and understanding by all
When an individual is contemplating suicide, he is truly suffering and hurting. It’s hard to see the emotional pain of another human being because it’s invisible. Even though you can’t see it, it is very real. As Socrates said, “Everyone is fighting some kind of battle.” I might not understand your specific battle, and you may not truly know the challenges that I am dealing with, but always be accepting and compassionate towards others. We have a terrible stigma around mental health in this country, and until that ends, suicides are going to continue and sadly increase. It’s about adopting the mindset that we are all in this together. In fact, the greatest service you can offer is to be there for someone else. Sometimes just giving that person a shoulder to lean on can make the difference between life and death.
The takeaway
If we don’t address the real underlying factors pushing people towards suicide, it’s only going to get worse. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said that the US suicide rate had risen steadily since 1999. Suicide rates are going up everywhere and for everyone. I believe it’s going to get much worse. For some, it’s simply a lot easier to walk away from all the pain and suffering than it is to face their problems head on.
Dr. Alok Trivedi is author of the book ‘Chasing Success’ and founder of The Aligned Performance Institute (alignedperformanceinstitute.com/).