38th over: England 286-7 (Ali 18, Plunkett 3) Moeen, who is nothing is not unflappable, hits a languid six over extra cover – and is well caught by the man in the lilac shirt in hospitality. His sunglasses don’t even fall off the top of his head.
37th over: England 277-7 (Ali 11, Plunkett 1) Willey plays a creamy off-push for four and a spanking pull for two, only to toe-end another pull. The Scots have done so well to drag themselves back into this.
36th over: England 270-6 (Ali 11, Willey 1) Moeen is shaping to play the anchor when he sees a half-volleyand chips it over square leg. That’s gone into the fish-and-chip van and out again.England still need 102.
35th over: England 263-5 (Billings 12, Ali 5) Desperate for a four, England get one as Evans tries a yorker to Billings which comes out as a juicy full toss. Seven from the over, England’s best since Morgan departed.
And Guy Hornsby is back to continue his bromance with John Starbuck. “That’s a good shout Mr Starbuck. We must get half a point for Federer, surely @TimdeLisle, given how good he looks in whites (but let’s forget that blazer nonsense, eh).”
34th over: England 256-5 (Billings 6, Ali 4) England need a boundary or two, and Scotland are not in a mood to oblige. That’s drinks, with the scales almost even.
33rd over: England 251-5 (Billings 3, Ali 2) Moeen plays another of his sleepy wafts at thin air, when he needs to switch on and play the Buttler. The required rate has sneaked up to seven. England are unlikely to run out of overs, thanks to Bairstow’s fireworks, but they could well run out of wickets.
32nd over: England 247-5 (Billings 1, Ali 1) Moeen, feeling the hot breath of the keeper down his neck, opens with a play-and-a-miss at Berrington. Moeen is in form, but Billings is not. And England’s top order have just given three wickets away. This could go to the wire now.
When we find ourselves in times of trouble, we reach for football references. “Cricket,” says Brian Withington, “bloody hell.”
“Having watched far too many England ‘clattering of the wicket’ collapses,” adds Andrew Chappell, “I can only imagine someone in the Scotland dressing room just now saying, encouragingly, ‘Lads, it’s England.’”
31st over: England 245-3 (Hales 52, Billings 0) Testing stuff from Alasdair Evans, conceding only three and then taking the wicket. He has a very respectable 5-1-32-1. In other news, Rafael Nadal has won his 11th French Open. Can’t they just give it to him for good now?
WICKET!!! Morgan c Coetzer b Evans 20 (England 245-4)
The short ball, which should be cannon fodder, surprises Morgan, who chips a catch to his opposite number, diving to his right at midwicket. That’s not game on, is it...?
Morgan walks for 20. Photograph: Craig Brough/Action Images via Reuters
30th over: England 243-3 (Hales 51, Morgan 19) Berrington’s over goes for only five, a little triumph. Apparently Nasser is being teased on Twitter about his pronunciation of Edinburgh. Bumble teases him some more by saying he is pronouncing it Ednbruh, when it should, of course, be Ednbruh.
29th over: England 238-3 (Hales 50, Morgan 15) Hales goes to a rather sheepish fifty, and the camera homes in on Root in the England tent, hoping for a scowl – but finding only a brisk round of applause. Morgan swings a six over midwicket. He has 15 off seven.
Here’s Brian Withington. “Why indeed?” says his subject line, picking up on Root’s parting shot. ““Am I alone in thinking that Alex Hales called the Test captain for a doomed single like a man who has retired from the red ball team?”
28th over: England 228-3 (Hales 48, Morgan 7) Eoin Morgan, always confident, always trusting in himself and his men, comes in and guides a half-volley from Sharif through the covers for four. The required rate is six and a half, and Morgan has seen that several hundred times. But still, Scotland have a sliver of a chance.
27th over: England 220-3 (Hales 47, Morgan 0) Leask is back, brave man. Root sweeps for four, then slog-sweeps for six, then perishes at the hands of his partner, who calls for an unnecessary single when he (Root) was pinned in his crease.
John Starbuck, who doesn’t miss much, has spotted Guy Hornsby’s question from the 22nd over. “Tim (not Tom, curse you autocorrect), in answer to Guy Hornsby’s question if the Greatest ever played cricket?
26th over: England 209-2 (Hales 46, Root 19) Like a grandfather surrounded by small children, cricket can go to sleep in any conditions. And you can always feel it, even when you’re 300 miles away. The last five overs have gone for only 26. Come on Halesy, time to go mental.
25th over: England 206-2 (Hales 44, Root 18) Watt pins Hales on his pad, the verdict is not out, and Scotland think long and hard about a review – so long that the review is disallowed. It would have been out! Apparently Kyle Coetzer took 19 seconds, rather than the allotted 15, but still, you’ve got to feel for him. It’s an unfunny game sometimes.
24th over: England 204-2 (Hales 43, Root 17) Sharif returns, sticks one down leg side, and appeals for caught behind against Hales in a bid to distract the umpire, which fails. Just when it seems as if England are going easy on their hosts, Hales comes up with a thump for six over mid-of, to bring up the 200.
23rd over: England 194-2 (Hales 35, Root 16) Coetzer brings back Watt and even hands him a slip, but Watt drifts one on with the arm and Root helps himself to a lap for four like a well-travelled businenessman at the breakfast buffet. Still, Watt is now the first Scot to concede fewer than seven an over – and only Moeen managed it for England.
22nd over: England 189-2 (Hales 35, Root 11) The Scots keeper, Matt Cross, is standing up to Berrington’s seamers, and it almost pays off as Root survives an appeal for a stumping. Then Berrington offers Hales a long hop outside off, which is smacked for four.
“In response to John Starbuck,” says Guy Hornsby, referring to 15:11, which seems several weeks ago now, “I’m aware of racing’s epithet but as I know nothing about it, and worship at the supreme willow and leather altar of glory/disappointment, I’m justifying claiming it from the turf. Does anyone know if The Greatest played cricket?”
21st over: England 183-2 (Hales 31, Root 10) Sole tries a bouncer to Hales, which induces an imperious pull and an entertaining throwback as Nasser Hussain slips back into his martinet-at-mid-off mode: “No! Not there! Not on this pitch!” Sole now knows how a whole generation of England bowlers felt.
20th over: England 176-2 (Hales 26, Root 8) The batsmen milk Berrington’s medium pace, and the target is below 200 now.It should be a walk in The Grange, but you never know.Scotland’s most economical bowlers, Sharif and Watt, have gone for seven an over.
19th over: England 171-2 (Hales 24, Root 5) So who would you like to see coming in once you’ve removed both openers? Ah yes, England’s most elegant and consistent batsman in decades. Joe Root gets off the mark with a dreamy glide for four off poor old Sole.
18th over: England 165-2 (Hales 23, Root 0) So Bairstow departs, after going down a gear from his peak of 84 off 39 – his last 21 runs occupied 20 balls, which, on this surface, is frankly rather sluggish. A pat on the back too for Kyle Coetzer, whose policy of changing the bowling every two minutes finally paid off. And that’s drinks. Irn-Bru all round, I take it.
And Brian Withington is back for more. “Whilst my par score calculator recovers in the freezer, and at the risk of an excess of hubris inducing presumption, would this be the first time that a 372 run chase could be described as a frolicking formality?” Either that, or the collapse is on.
WICKET!!! Bairstow c Munsey b Berrington 105 (England 165-2)
That’s the one Scotland wanted. Bairstow looks to loft another six over mid-off and mistimes it, giving Munsey plenty of time to think about how embarrassing it would be to drop him – and he doesn’t. Well caught, well bowled, and very well batted.
Munsey catches Bairstow for 105. Photograph: Craig Brough/Action Images via Reuters
17th over: England 159-1 (Bairstow 101, Hales 21) Back comes Chris Sole, and it all goes even more horribly wrong. Hales, who has been biding his time, decides it’s time to pepper the crowd, and hits two sixes. Here comes yet another bowling change, the seventh.
16th over: England 141-1 (Bairstow 100, Hales 4) Evans, building on his maiden, concedes a string of singles, but can’t stop Bairstow clipping to midwicket to reach a fabulous hundred. He has gone at a personal tempo of six an over: if he keeps it up all the way to the target, he will get about 265.
And it’s a record-breaker, not quite for speed (54 balls), but because it’s Jonny Bairstow’s third in a row, the first time that has been done for England. Imagine what he’d be like in Tests if he didn’t have to keep wicket.
Bairstow celebrates reaching his century. Photograph: Craig Brough/Action Images via Reuters
15th over: England 136-1 (Bairstow 98, Hales 1) Bored of blasting it, Bairstow subjects Watt to the finest of paddles for four. Undaunted, Watt has a good shout for LBW as Bairstow sweeps and misses; Scotland might have reviewed if they had more than one card to play with, but it was just sliding down, according to Hawkeye. Bairstow then slogs a couple, not far from the man at midwicket. He’s only human after all.
14th over: England 130-1 (Bairstow 92, Hales 1) Evans manages a few dots, gold dust on a day like this, then beats Hales outside off and completes a maiden over. Give him the Man of the Match award now.
“Now that 10 overs have passed,” says Brian Withington, “I find that my par score calculator has melted in the presence of the Bairstow barrage. Good job Jos Buttler has been rested.”
13th over: England 130-1 (Bairstow 92, Hales 1) Coetzer does another U-turn, heading back to Watt, who manages to get the ball past Bairstow’s bat and lodge an LBW appeal (going down), before removing Roy with a very KP-ish dismissal. Buttler’s record is safe, as Bairstow has now faced 45 balls, and even he is unlikely to hit an eight.
12th over: England 128-0 (Roy 34, Bairstow 91) Roy picks up a two and a one, then Bairstow swats a short one for six, very nearly into the confectionery stall and out again. Happily Mike Atherton, the closest thing to Benaud these days, is on duty, so he utters these very words. England now have a third of the runs in a quarter of the overs. Early finish, anyone?
11th over: England 118-0 (Roy 31, Bairstow 84) Richie Berrington comes on, so instead of spin from both ends, it’s now military medium from both ends. I’m not sure that’s wise, although you can’t blame Coetzer for panicking – this is, as Woody says in Toy Story, the perfect time to panic. Bairstow adds two fours to his collection with a sweep and a biff. The record for England’s fastest hundred is held by the absent Jos Buttler, with 46 balls, so Bairstow needs 16 off six to beat it.
10th over: England 107-0 (Roy 29, Bairstow 75) The beleaguered Coetzer turns to Alasdair Evans, but the result is the same: Bairstow blitzes 6-4-4 off successive balls, to cruise to 75 off 35. He’s making Roy look like Chris Tavare. The definition of courage in cricket is now a Scotsman doing stretches to catch the captain’s eye.
9th over: England 92-0 (Roy 28, Bairstow 61) Poor old Leask is leaking runs as Bairstow goes ballistic: the over goes for 25 – and we go ball-by-ball, 466.3w6. The second six gives Bairstow fifty off 27 balls, the sixth-fastest by an England player in 47 years of one-day internationals. He may get to a hundred in about five minutes.
Bairstow on his way to his half century. Photograph: Philip Brown/Getty Images
8th over: England 67-0 (Roy 28, Bairstow 39) Bairstow almost gives a chance off Watt, flapping into the covers, but instantly reasserts himself with a lofted off drive for the first six of the innings.
7th over: England 55-0 (Roy 27, Bairstow 28) Spin from both ends!Michael Leask comes on with his offbreaks and concedes only aingles, which constitutes a triumph today.
And look who’s here. I wonder if he was consulted on the Stones’ latest piece of merchandise, a Gray Nicolls bat with a tongue logo, yours for just £999.
Charlie Watts of the Rolling Stones is at The Grange. Photograph: Jane Barlow/PA
6th over: England 51-0 (Roy 25, Bairstow 26) Coetzer, in a tight corner, turns to spin – slow left-arm from Mark Watt. Roy, unperturbed, cuts for three, with a hand from a misfield. Bairstow trots down the track and lofts four over extra cover, even though he didn’t quite get there.
5th over: England 43-0 (Roy 22, Bairstow 21) Bairstow goes forward to punch through the covers, then rocks back to late-cut past third man. He’s only faced 13 balls, and his eye is right in.
Here’s Brian Withington, striking a note of caution. “They say you don’t know the par score until the second team have faced ten overs or so. One thing I would venture at this stage is that the Grange groundsperson knows how to prepare a decent firm surface with consistent bounce. Any chance he (or she) might venture south and show a few others how it’s done?”
4th over: England 32-0 (Roy 20, Bairstow 12) Bairstow, facing Sole, offers a catchable edge to the slips, but there aren’t any. Kyle Coetzer, who set the tone so well with the bat, has been a bit anxious with his fields, fiddling when he could be showing faith in his bowlers. Roy cashes in with a comfy cover drive for four, and Bairstow adds a blazing square drive for four more. England are on top, but there’s a long way to go.
3rd over: England 22-0 (Roy 15, Bairstow 7) Bairstow comes to the party with an upright guide through the covers for four more. The pitch is so true, it could be a story by Carole Cadwalladr.
“Is it foolish,” asks Andrew Benton, “to liken today’s game to battles past? Will it be a Bannockburn, or a Flodden? And where are the French? (their coach, it says on the net, is a Tim de Leede...)” Ah yes, Tim Nice But Good at Cricket.
2nd over: England 15-0 (Roy 13, Bairstow 2) Chris Sole takes the new ball, and “he looks an athlete,” says Bumble. But he strays towards the pads, so Roy helps himself to two twos and two fours, the second a rasping pull. His timing is in good working order, and they are up with the required rate.
“Rob,” says Michael Keane. I’ve had worse. “Anyone who knows royal history knows that the actual Sport of Kings is real tennis. Henry VIII played while one of his wives was beheaded...2 french kings died on court...there are courts at Hampton Court Palace, Falkland Palace, Fontainebleau and of course Lord’s. Oh, and the, um, Queens Club.
“I’ve been working at a Lord’s today,” he adds, “wearing my tartan tie while doing tours. No Scottish visitors. I guess they’re all watching TV.”
1st over: England 3-0 (Roy 1, Bairstow 2) Jason Roy is already living dangerously, flapping Saatyan Sharif’s second ball just short of backward point. Jonny Bairstow survives a half-hearted appeal for caught down the leg side, then picks up a hard-run two with a push into a mysteriously empty leg side. Just 369 more to get.
The players are coming out, to be greeted by a ripple of hubbub.The crowd can sniff history: can Davey beat Goliath? One thing in Scotland’s favour is that the man best equipped to see England over the line, Jos Buttler, isn’t here.
“Well,” says William Hargreaves, “I think we should just take the ball away and be done with it. If they can’t play our sport properly, then it’s a poor show. Fancy spoiling it like that.”
Afternoon everyone and thanks Rob. This game couldn’t be better set up: it’s either going to be a famous victory or a fabulous run chase. Either way, there will be plenty of exclamation marks.
The only thing missing is an email from John Starbuck. And here he comes,. off his long run. “Tom,” he begins, a little unpromisingly. “Re Guy Hornsby’s claim (over 47) that cricket is the Sport of Kings, this isn’t quite right. The Sport of Kings is generally acknowledged to be horse-racing. Cricket is the Greatest Game; football is the Beautiful Game; tennis is Anyone’s Game; boxing is the Noble Art; rugby is for hooligans and darts is just Arrers.”
I’m going for a walk to try to make sense of what we’ve just seen. Tim de Lisle will talk you through England’s run-chase - you can email him here. Bye!
Calum MacLeod ends the innings on 140 not out from 96 balls, a staggering innings that has given Scotland a chance of an even more staggering victory. If England reach their target of 372, it will equal the second-highest runchase in ODI history. Astonishing stuff.
50th over: Scotland 371-5 (MacLeod 140, Leask 10) Hahahaha. Michael Leask walks to the crease and waves his first ball nonchalantly over long off! Whatever happens in the second innings, Scotland fans will be talking about this batting performance forever. They have pulverised the No1 team in the world. England need 372 to win.
