Mother’s Day: Meet these mothers who inspired daughters to follow in their footsteps

Mom. Ma. Ammi. Mummy. Masterchef. Mentor. Most stylish. Makes everything alright...the list is endless. There can be no one way to talk about your mother. The same mummy who will bake for you a delicious fluffy chocolate cake while cooing with love can turn into a sarcasm-dripping, high-pitched banshee on hearing you backtalk or skipping school lessons. Just as the Internet is flooded with memes of angry moms, there are countless examples of children crediting their success and achievements solely to their mothers. And while every day is just as good a day to thank and acknowledge your mother for all that she does, it seems appropriate we do so on Mother’s Day.

Here’s meeting working mothers and daughters with inspirational stories of their own.

EMOTIONAL ANCHOR

Mother: Sonali Arora, chief commissioner of income tax, Shimla

Daughter: Megha Arora, UPSC rank 108

“If there’s one thing that I have learnt from my mom, it is compassion. She is extremely large hearted and benevolent in her inter-personal relationships. She is an emotional anchor for all of us and especially for my father. She has made me believe that I could achieve anything I set my heart and mind to,” says Megha Arora, as we ask her about her mother, Sonali.

These life lessons have worked out well for the young Megha, who returned from the US and UK after higher studies to pursue a career as a bureaucrat like her mother. “As a mother, you support your child in whatever they wish to do. When she decided to study abroad, we supported it. In fact, we weren’t sure she would come back. So it took us by surprise that she wanted to return and take the civil services exam. But we made sure we supported her decision,” says Sonali.

She feels mothers need to offer all the emotional support they can to make their children strong individuals. “Professional jobs can be demanding. But I learnt to keep a balance and always took out time for the family. It’s wise to take short periods of leave, especially when children need you,” is her advice for working mothers.

For Megha, who also has an elder sister Neha, a doctor, settled in Canada, some of her favourite childhood memories are visiting her mother’s office. “Seeing my mother go to office everyday left an indelible mark on me. I always strived to become economically and professionally empowered to do big things,” admits Megha, who is gearing up to start a career as a bureaucrat.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

Mother: Keshni Anand Arora, additional chief secretary, Haryana

Daughter: Shruti Arora, UPSC rank 118

Mother Keshni Anand Arora with daughter Shruti Arora. (Sanjeev Sharma/HT)

Even though she comes from a family of bureaucrats – her mother being a distinguished IAS officer along with her aunts – Shruti admits she was always given the freedom to choose. “My mother is hard working and I always looked up to her,” says Shruti. “It was in college that I decided to prepare for the civil services exam. Though it wasn’t a smooth run, my parents were supportive,” she says.

Having cleared the exam in her third attempt, the she is set to join the Indian Police Service.

“I taught my daughters to believe in themselves. We have nurtured them to be independent in thought and to face challenges as they come,” says mom Keshni. As parents, the bureaucrat says it’s equally important to teach children how to cope with struggles and failure. And that’s something Shruti admits has helped her. “I was always encouraged even if success didn’t come the first time,” says the avid fencer, who was also encouraged to try varied things.

Despite her mother’s stature, Shruti says she was never intimidated. “We are best friends and do a lot of things together, be it going out shopping or having coffee or having a heart to heart conversation,” she adds.

PASSION AND PROFESSION

Mother: Dr GK Bedi, gynaecologist and IVF specialist

Daughter: Dr Raveena Bedi, assistant professor, radio diagnosis, GMCH-32

Mother Dr GK Bedi with daughter Dr Raveena Bedi. (HT Photo)

When Dr GK Bedi learnt her daughter, Raveena, wanted to be a doctor, at first she tried to dissuade her. “As parents you want your children to have an easier life. As first generation doctors and later starting our own practice, we knew it was a challenging profession. I gave Raveena the freedom to choose other careers as well,” says Dr Bedi, who has spent over three decades in the profession.

But Raveena decided to follow her mother’s often-dished out advice – to find your passion and make it a profession. “I saw how happy my mom would go to work each day as she loved her profession. I knew that I also wanted to be a doctor and she understood what it meant to me,” says Dr Raveena.

Today, they may be specialising in different areas but Dr Raveena feels the lessons her mother taught her have helped her evolve both as a doctor and person. “From her, I have learnt how important it is to have a career and how to balance a personal and professional life. She has been a pillar of support always and if I can be even a fraction of what she is, it would be an achievement,” admits Dr Raveena.

As a working mother, Dr Bedi feels it’s important to instil family values in children. “I became a mother at 24 and learnt to balance life and work early on. The family support at home helped my children and me. Working mothers often feel guilty about not being able to spend enough time but it matters more that you spend quality time. You have to lead by example and children are sharp learners. Today, I am lucky as both my children value the hard work I put in,” says Dr Bedi.

LEARN FROM ONE ANOTHER

Mother: Honii Sandhu, designer and creative head, Opulent Heirlooms

Daughter: Mminaal Sandhu, fashion designer

Mother Honii Sandhu with daughter Mminaal Sandhu (Sanjeev Sharma/HT)

She’s been dressing up the who’s who of the region for 23 years now. But even though designer Honii Sandhu was hard at work establishing her signature fashion label, she never pushed her daughters, Mminaal and Scheherazade to join the business.

“I wanted them to choose for themselves,” says Sandhu. So it didn’t come as a surprise when elder daughter Mminaal decided to pursue formal education in fashion design from Central St Martins, London, and later the London School of Fashion. “Initially, I wasn’t sure about following in my mother’s footsteps. But a chance to design outfits for my friends and then later when I started dealing with clients independently, I realised I enjoyed doing this and was equally passionate like my mother,” says Mminaal.

At their joint workspace and studio, the two designers complement each other. “My mother is a perfectionist and I see that in the way she works and the designs she makes,” says Sandhu, who always looks up to her suggestions when she is stuck somewhere.

Incidentally, the two have their distinct styles. While Honii is a traditionalist, Mminaal’s designs are contemporary and targeted at a younger age group. “I let her choose the way she wants to approach design. It is important to not only give your child freedom but also have trust in what they choose to do,” says Honii, who doesn’t believe in tutoring children to be the way parents want them to be. “It’s wise to have an open relationship and offer support wherever you can,” says this mom.

FREEDOM TO CHOOSE

Mother: Deepa Singh, advocate, Punjab and Haryana high court and former additional advocate general, Punjab

Daughter: Malvika Singh, assistant advocate general, Punjab

Mother Deepa Singh with daughter Malvika Singh (Sant Arora/HT)

As a first generation lawyer in. her family, Deepa Singh knew her career choice wasn’t an easy one. But hard work and perseverance paid off. Little did she know that one day, her daughter would do her proud in the same way.

“I was in seventh standard when my mom starting working. I would love to hear her stories from work and in some way I think that helped me make my decision to be a lawyer too,” says Malvika. An alumna of the University of California, Berkeley, and Panjab University, where she did her doctorate, Malvika credits her mother for the person she is today. “She has shown me that we are our own wishing tree and we can align ourselves with our destiny to become the person we are meant to be,” she says.

For Deepa, who has another daughter, also a lawyer, her role was to give both children sound education and the freedom of choice. “You can’t spoon-feed them. As a mother and as parents, you have to not just guide them but make them strong and independent to make own choices,” says the advocate.

Believe in yourself is a mantra she has given her daughters. “I am like a friend to them. We gym together, go for runs together,” Deepa says. And this Mother’s Day, Malvika also shares her mother’s advice: You evolve in crisis, it’s the best teacher. So don’t shy away from difficult situations. Face them head on.