Anything but the 9-5: 16 years as a sex therapist
Sex therapist Jane McPherson thinks it would be helpful if we could talk about sex the same way we talk about food.
STEPHANIE MITCHELL reports on people working anything but the 9 to 5.
Walking into Bond Therapy you become instantly relaxed, which is lucky because if you are there you are there to talk about sex.
The New Plymouth space is industrial but bright, the artwork is vibrant but not intrusive, and you are welcomed by the smiling face of Jane McPherson.
McPherson trained as a sex therapist 16 years ago after spotting a need in her community.
McPherson may not be the only sex therapist in New Plymouth but she's the only one who brands herself as such - which she thinks is important.
"As humans we have huge difficulties talking about sex. We can joke about sex, we can laugh at sex, but to actually talk about our own truth around sex, that doesn't happen very often."
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That is why, although offering a range of therapy services, McPherson decided to label herself as a sex and relationship therapist.
"It's about promoting talking about sex easily, without all the hang ups that go along with it.
"The more we are able to talk about sexuality well and in all its variations then hopefully we're going to be promoting way better education for our children growing up."
McPherson got into sex therapy after she saw seven clients in a row. She saw a need so decided to get the training to help meet that need and became a sex and relationship therapist.
Now, 16 years later, she runs her own business and works with men and women, singles and couples, of all different sexual preferences.
"Sex therapy is about helping people with their sexual function which could be about anything from a real physiological or biological problem to something that is going on in the relationship to cause an upheaval, which cause anxiety and depression, which often interferes with sexual function."
McPherson said she loved running her own business.
"I don't have a boss which is absolutely wonderful.
"I say I'd be unemployable now because a boss would say 'oh you've got to do this by such-and-such' and I'm likely to say 'actually I don't feel like today so I'll see how I go tomorrow'."
The first session with McPherson works by clients telling her what's going on and what got them there.
"I'll ask questions and then generally when I get a bit of an understanding of what's going on I know where I'm going to come in from to start doing the work.
"It could be a number of things. A woman might turn up and say, or a man will say, 'I don't feel anything' or 'I don't feel sexual'."
McPherson thinks sex should be discussed the same way we discuss food.
"We often group food and sex together because we have to have food to survive and we have to have sex, generally speaking, to survive," she said.
"We have a lot of conversations around food like what do you want for dinner tonight? Where do you want to eat? Do you want to eat in or out? How should we cook the spuds? How should we do the meat? Have you tried this sauce? Taste this.
"So you know we can have huge, wonderful conversations around food but can't really do that with sex."
- Stuff
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