How do I tell my wife that she needs to exercise more without sounding like a chauvinist?
How do I tell my wife that she needs to exercise more without sounding like a chauvinist?
Do you exercise? I hope you do if you want her to. I suggest you tell her why it's important to you and let her decide if she wants to listen or not. It's her body, after all. As for chauvinism, I don't think she will think of you as one if the two of you have a relationship built on honesty and openness.
A few months ago, I made the mistake of asking my boyfriend to be honest with me no matter what. Since that conversation, he thinks it's perfectly okay to say anything that comes to his mind, even if it hurts me. If I wear something that isn't flattering, for instance, he points it out even if it hurts my feelings. When I ask him why he says these nasty things, he tells me it's because I'm the one who asked him to be honest. I am not asking him to lie, but I think a little sensitivity would go a long way. Being brutally honest is one thing, but ignoring another person's feelings completely is not what I had in mind either, when I asked him to tell me how he felt. How do I get him to see my point of view? He will simply ask why I have changed my mind about being honest, without understanding what I'm trying to say.
Your boyfriend is obviously a child who has yet to understand that there is a fine line between being honest and being insensitive. He has no excuse for using your plea for honesty against you, because it shows a lack of respect for you and your feelings. Please tell him that. Also explain very slowly, using infographics if necessary, that you haven't change your mind about the importance of honesty in a relationship, but that he needs to spend a little time thinking about mutual respect if he wants this to work.
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