We should educate our children, for that matter even immature adults, to leverage the social media platform for positive benefits and not let it become an addiction
When we were growing up, we would be rewarded for scoring well in exams; helping someone; doing household chores, etiquette among others. Today, things have come to such a pass that one has to reward his/her children for not spending too much time on Facebook. Parents keep reinforcing their children that their academic performance must take precedence over their preoccupation with the social network.
To his credit, Mark Zuckerberg leveraged technology to create this wonderful platform for social networking where people from the other side of the globe can connect with their childhood friends and reminisce about their escapades at school, or share a fond memory of getting together with school buddies after college. His idea needs to be lauded as a very innovative one in helping connect with people. It is this ubiquitous Facebook that helped many people locate and connect with their classmates, college friends, neighbours, distant cousins with whom they had not been in touch for decades. Some of these long lost friends may have been living in the same city for a couple of decades without having met. This has brought a lot of joy to millions, who now have regular get-togethers or at least telephone calls.
However, looking at the younger generation, one finds it difficult to comprehend — are the youngsters/children/students using this medium to actually connect or brag about their ‘achievement’, ‘activities’, visits to foreign tourist destinations? Gone are the days when we would take out our treasured albums and fondly show it to our friends, family members and visitors. Instant gratification has replaced fond memories. Instead of the sheer fun of enjoying a holiday, or the excitement of owning a new car, the focus is now on bragging about a Maldives trip or a new BMW or even something as inane as having lunch at an upmarket restaurant. All this for a few likes from their Facebook friends!
My daughter's friends and cousins boast of over a thousand friends on Facebook while in real life most of their relationships are shallow and superficial. Surprisingly, they do not get the time to wish their neighbours or speak to their grandparents at home. Worst of all, even an introverted child, who finds it difficult to make friends, has hundreds of friends over Facebook! Isn't this a paradox? Mind it — most of these Facebook friends are mere acquaintances — sometimes children may not even have met them, let alone know them intimately.
Let alone kids, teenagers and even adults are not far behind in posting the most inconsequential events like feeling great, having chhole bhature at Haldiram, in the mall… So much for ‘mature’ usage of social media! How did this help connect? How I wish parents could take out some time to keep it private at the family level instead of publicly displaying/announcing their parties, love and affection or compliments.
Thanks to Facebook for having given rise to impulsive flaunting/display behaviour. Without rhyme or reason, a person sitting in the aircraft clicks a pic and posts it to thousands. Where is the interaction? One fine day, you wake up to see someone connected through someone has bought an expensive car. Why not make a concerted effort to use this platform for the right purpose rather than giving news about personal whereabouts, wealth acquisition? Where is the privacy when there is so much public display? Can we engage ourselves in more meaningful conversation? It hurts more when adults start behaving in immature ways while using such a great platform. Rather, it is the adults who should be feeling uneasy and taking the first step in mending their ways and passing it on to the youngsters. That apart, children, teenagers are especially vulnerable to cyber stalking and cyber bullying which we as parents must be always vigilant about.
For many youngsters, it is an addiction. Yes, when you start taking interest in people whom you do not know, as well as those who are remotely connected with you. If this isn't voyeurism, then what is it? Instead of reading a novel, going out to play with friends or joining the family chit chat, if one is glued to Facebook, what more can be said, if not addiction? Due to this, the importance of performance in exams, interest in co-curricular and extracurricular activities, spending time with parents and grandparents etc takes a backseat.
When today almost everyone cribs of not getting time to speak to family members, where is this networking helping us? How many today, especially those living in metros, know their neighbours and chat with them? Without even realising, you are intruding into the lives of people with whom, may be, you will never connect. Youngsters, who crib about not getting time to read the newspaper, which is an integral part of their growing up, spend a lot of time on Facebook. Facebook is definitely a powerful medium and can be used effectively for societal benefits like education, health awareness, civil liberties, civic responsibilities. However, for most part, it is being used for frivolous events or for spreading fake stories and communal tension.
We should educate our children, for that matter even immature adults, to leverage this platform for positive benefits and even if it is used for social networking, not take it to the level of addiction. Guidance and monitoring by parents is the need of the hour. I do not mean to say that it should be used for all serious purposes or end up spying. Can we make it more useful by a little bit of education? Facebook, when used in the right sense has immense value. Looking at it as a major technological revolution, helping us connect and relate with each other, it should be used as a boon rather than becoming a bane, knowingly or unknowingly. Taking forward this boon, it should be used productively, supplementing to the demographic dividend of India.
(The writer is Associate Professor, The NorthCap University, Gurgaon)