The best teacher

As I prepared to offer my condolences to a friend upon a death in the family, I picked up Michael Singer and read: “No person or situation could ever teach you as much as death has to teach you.”  I was so struck by the coincidence that I concluded it was not coincidental at all.  I continued to read “The Untethered Soul,” a book that I have read and reread several times. I marveled at the content of the chapter as I continued reading.

Death is an incredible teacher and facing death squarely in the eye every moment of the day is the way to live life to the fullest. At first, seeming to be paradoxical as I read Singer, I recognized the intensity of that way of life and yet how mindful it is as well.  I generally associate mindfulness with tranquility, acceptance, freedom from distraction and being serenely focused — but not intense.  And yet when I act mindfully being that focused is in itself intense.

For those of us who are tied to our possessions and take satisfaction from what we have acquired in our lifetime, death tells us in an instant that those “things” are of no consequence — for in an instant they are gone. For those who place great stock in their physical appearance — working out at the gym; wearing the latest fashion; making sure we don’t lose our hair; even going so far as spending large sums on plastic surgery to “look our best” — it's gone in a second and our body either turns to dust or is burned.  

People have championed the concept of racial equality and the fact that no one is better than another based on gender or economic status but it has been a fight and there are still those who disagree and yet in death we are all equal.  Death plays no favorites.  Death instantly renders us the same – dead.

Consider relationships, family and especially those we love deepest — do we take them for granted?  Do we tell them how important they are to us daily?  Do we spend enough time with them?  After all, when death comes there is no more time.  Death teaches us to make each moment count.  If we aren’t mindful about death we can easily take time for granted.  And yet we don’t know when death will come for us or our loved one.  We must seize the moment and use the time we have wisely.  We should keep death overhead at all times to live life deeply and with meaning to our utmost.  With death overhead or right in front of us we will make the most of the moment. It is the moment that is all we have. We don’t have tomorrow and yesterday is gone.

Look at those things you are working for – what we think we need.  What if you die tomorrow?  Did you really need it?  Was there something else you really do want to do or need to do?   Do you need to say something to someone or just be with someone more than that for which you were working?  Recognizing death is perhaps around the corner can do wonders in helping one prioritize.

Why is it that we get lost in our pursuit of the inconsequential?  What are we doing?  Are we trying to control what will happen in an hour; tomorrow; or the next day?  Do we hesitate to say what we mean and what we truly feel because we want to be accepted by those around us? 

Because we know we are going to die we need to say and do what needs to be said and what needs to be done. If you live life fully and quit fearing what people might think you will not have to worry about last wishes. You will have lived life fully and without regrets. 

Death is an incredible teacher because by being mindful of death we will live life mindfully. If we are true to ourselves and the moment recognizing it is time to prioritize and make the moment count we live boldly and with honesty. Death is our greatest teacher.  

This is the opinion of Peter Donohue, who has been involved in the arts in Central Minnesota for more than 35 years. His column is published the third Tuesday of the month.