It might be reasonable to assume that most of us by now have dispensed with the idea of New Year’s resolutions, as they often don’t pan out and seem to be more of a ritual than something that really works. So I have excused myself from having to do any formal resolutions for the last several years.
I kind of ran into a small glitch with this anti-resolution effort a week or so ago. I honestly didn’t see it coming, and maybe some of the most profound things in our lives we don’t always see in advance.
I was in a fairly large southeastern city during the holidays and riding with family downtown. It was a rainy, gray cold winter day and I just happened to see this scene unfold in front of me. An African-American man who appeared to be homeless was sitting in a bus stop presumably to shelter from the elements with his shopping cart and bundles of blankets beside him. A car pulled up on the opposite side of the street and a white woman jumped out with a bag in her hand and quickly, dodging raindrops, walked to the man in the shelter.
The interaction was quick and yet very powerful because it was apparent that she was handing him a holiday basket, other needed items and a few minutes of conversation. I hate sharing things like this because sometimes you don’t want to share your emotions. I wish I could explain it because immediately tears swelled in my eyes and a few made it to my cheek, but I didn’t want fellow passengers to know.
Quickly I remembered the words of the great prophet to give a cup of cold water. It was obvious in that short exchange that they came from different worlds but in that brief moment of time, they were neighbors. I won’t make up a story for the woman but I imagined that this was not her only stop and the now pouring rain and cold didn’t provide an excuse but perhaps more of a reason.
Could I make that my resolution, I thought? Maybe I should just daily give a cup of cold water. Not an actual cup but a kindness…a handshake…a hug…a pleasant word…a meal…encouragement…support…conversation. I don’t want to, I thought…I’m tired…the country is too divided and we are too far apart. I’m tired of the headlines and the tragedies and losses. But it’s not asking that much…it’s just a cup of cold water. How could I argue back?
Several days later, on my flight back, an elderly white lady sat next to me and I tried to hide in my readings that I set aside for the flight. She tried to strike up a conversation and I answered as briefly as I could. But soon I remembered I should share a cup of cold water. She shared about her seizures and told me where her meds were if she had one, she told me about her sister she had just visited who was dying from cancer and her granddaughter who was meeting her who was paralyzed from an accident. I listened, I responded, I asked about her immediate family and where she lived. I told her the flight would be OK and I would help her if she needed. I gave that cup of cold water.
No…no New Year’s resolutions, but I will try to give a cup of whatever my neighbor needs each day. After all, the only thing we really have is each other.
Lyle Foster is part of the Commercial Street Merchants Association and active in several local organizations.