Crackerless Diwali? Tej Pratap has cracker of an idea: Balloons

Tej Pratap Yadav is ingenious. A new-era, young politician with a difference who can blow into a flute with the same ease as blowing sense into nonsense that firecrackers are. Unlike politicians who believe in blowing their own trumpet, Tej Pratap Yadav believes in blowing up balloons if the occasion demands it.

A Supreme Court ban has made it difficult for people in the National Capital Region to procure fire crackers this Diwali. Elsewhere in the country, a new wave of enlightenment has led to even children saying no to firecrackers. Bad air quality in cities has made people realise we are better off with lights and say no to smoke and noise of firecrackers.

Former Bihar Minister Tej Pratap Yadav has a smoke-free solution that is not noiseless. Balloons. Hundreds of balloons. Thousands if you can afford them. Blow them up, exercise your lungs a little. And wait for it.

"Crackers cause pollution, better is to blow up balloons and burst them.There will be no harm in this," Tej Pratap Yadav told ANI news agency while attempting to change gears inside a car he was not driving, the trendy new shades in place to avoid direct eye contact. The budding politician was last blowing the conch at the Rashtriya Janata Dal rally in Patna. That was the war bugle against Nitish Kumar.

The latest war bugle puts political force behind innocuous and underrated balloons in its battle against firecrackers for the pride of place in the festival of lights.

This surely is a new solution to the middle class problem: How to celebrate a pollution-free Diwali and let people know that you got money. A cracker-less Diwali was pollution-free and noiseless. Tej Pratap Yadav's solution is air pollution-free yet loud enough to let the neighbourhood know you got more balloons than everyone else.

Imagine thousands of balloons being pricked one after the other, bringing the noise of the ludicrously expensive ladi back into Diwali life. Oh the feels, only topped by the top of the world feels if you are doing it on the terrace. An unambiguous signal to the mohalla: Daddy got me these balloons and I can haz the bursts. Party time! Da boyz balloonz time. Boom! Ma daddy founded the party. I blew up this. I burst. Boom!

The question to ask at this point is: Why couldn't senior ruling and Opposition figures think of a solution to pollution during Diwali? Well, this is why politics needs the new generation, the new blood. Happy Diwali! Say no to crackers. Say yes to balloons. Inflate your ego without deflating your lungs.

(Note: This story has been written as seriously as Tej Pratap makes his point. We wish our readers and Tej a Happy Diwali that may or may not involve balloons.)

Also Watch : Flouting Supreme Court's ban, firecrackers being sold illegally in Delhi-NCR